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October: Domestic Violence Awareness Month

It isn't hard to picture the women who make a difference in your life- your mom, sister, perhaps a best friend- many people come to mind. Now, imagine one out of every three women you know being the victim of domestic violence. As difficult as that may be to even consider, it's a reality for many people because one out of every three women do face abuse from a spouse or partner. While domestic violence may be the leading cause of injury for women age 15-44, the scars it leaves behind go far beyond cuts and bruises. An exact statistic on how many people are victims of domestic violence is impossible to give, because so many cases go unreported. Many organizations hope to help change that, this month in particular, by publicizing what domestic abuse is, who the victims are, the signs of domestic abuse and what to do if you find yourself in an unsafe situation.

The American Psychiatric Association defines domestic violence as the "control by one partner over another in a dating, marital or live-in relationship. The means of control include physical, sexual, emotional and economic abuse, threats and isolation. Simply put, domestic violence is the endangerment and mistreatment by one person to another. People of all ethnicities, orientations, socioeconomic classes, religions, and ages are victims of domestic violence; this is a problem that effects any and every kind of person.

Conventionally speaking, women are most often portrayed as the victims of domestic violence, and men the abuser. However, men face the perils of domestic abuse as well, 1 in every 14 men to be specific. Unfortunately, men are much less likely than women to seek help for their situations. The effects of domestic violence spread beyond the victim and abuser, destroying friendships and traumatizing children as well.

One of the best strategies to combat domestic violence is to make everyone aware of the signs, so that they can avoid dangerous situations themselves and help those they see in them. Dangerous relationships rarely start off as abusive, but progress over time. Catching the early signs can be the difference between life and death, in some situations. Controlling behavior exhibited early on in any relationship is not healthy, and any attempts to isolate the victim from friends and family should not be ignored. Psychologists agree that in these early stages, victims often go into denial, and rule behavior such as that to be an act of passion. They fail to see what a mistake they have made until it's too late. Controlling and isolating behavior soon turn to controlling action, and physical abuse enters the equation. Verbal abuse is amplified, with the intent of eroding self esteem and self worth. Victims fall into the habit of blaming themselves for the abuse and feel they deserve no better. The abuser has gotten what he or she wanted, and a dangerous relationship has been established.

As bleak and grim as these situations may be, they are not without hope. A nearly infinite amount of resources are available to aid in coping with domestic violence. If you find yourself or someone you love in a situation such as this, the first step is talking and admitting there is indeed a problem, and it is in no way your fault. Remove yourself from the relationship by talking to friends and family and finding a way to distance yourself from the abuser. If necessary, legal action should be taken. If you're unsure of how to escape domestic violence, any of the following resources would be most useful to take advantage of: