The Iraq War: Why I Went

The Iraq War: Why I Went I was 20 when they gave me my orders to transfer to another unit and prepare to ship out for war. I updated my will, called my loved ones, told my girlfriend and waited. I never thought I would be in a war during my time with the United States Army. I had one of those jobs you hoped you never had to perform, a combat medic.

At this point in my career, I had only a year left in service before I was to be honorably discharged. I was 'Short', and didn't want to die.

We all see the war on television, hear it on the radio, read it in newspapers and magazines. Some call it a recurrence of the Vietnam War, a hasty conflict justified by the fear of a non-verified threat. It was the spread of communism then, now it's terrorism and weapons of mass destruction.

The motive for the war has undergone various changes, from the search and seizure of these WOMD's, oil commandeering, overthrowing a regime, to establish a permanent US military presence, to even the radical theory of wiping out a major Muslim country. Everyone has different thoughts and opinions, but unlike the Vietnam War, our country is supporting our troops with open hearts and arms.

The support was wonderful, boarding a plane with childrens drawings taped up in the cabin. Getting care packages from schools, letters from students, my parents tying and stapling yellow ribbons all over their home. But as nice and encouraging as it was, once we got home, a lot of veterans were given the shaft.

18% of the homeless people in America are Operation Iraqi Freedom veterans. An even larger percentile of the homeless are Vietnam War veterans, and another undisclosed percentage are veterans from the first Gulf War. When you say that you'll support the troops, a handshake and hug is nice, but it won't help the soldier out in the long run.

I was lucky, I had a job lined up for me when I got out of the Army. But that fell through after a couple months and I was fired. After that, I filed for unemployment, my marriage failed, I slipped into alcoholism and drifted from temporary job to temporary job. Yes, I was the lucky one.

Other veterans and soldiers that I know or knew, are homeless, not able to get a decent job. Others aren't getting the financial aid that they need, loans, and other various financial failings. I knew a soldier, who went to high school at my school. Graduated top of his class, went to college with a large scholarship. When war broke out, he finished his Associates, and went into the Army as an infantryman. He could have easily picked a more lax and laid back occupation, but he was adamant and determined to be an infantryman for his nation. After doing his time and coming back to the states, I lost touch with him. A couple years later, I find out he's in Baltimore City, homeless and mentally unstable. He sits on street corners, begging for change because he can't get a job. He came back from the war with extreme cases of Post Traumatic Distress Order (PTSD) and it rendered him incapable of functioning.

I find this outrageous! A man volunteered for a 'War of choice' and this is the thanks of a grateful nation? He could have stayed in school, gotten a job as a lawyer that he wanted, could have been living it up; but he chose to live a different life. A life in service to his country and fellow Americans. They threw him under the tracks, not able to get help, get a job, not even able to live like a human being. A human being who risked his life like many, to serve and defend a country in a war that is not popular nor supported.

The war was harsh, life changing and unforgettable. You see things, do things that you are not proud of. The media twist and turns the truth for entertainment value and bleeding heart sensationalism. The general populace of America does not know what goes on overseas, they are not witness to the circumstances and conditions.

Abu Ghraib was inexcusable, I was ashamed to be an American soldier that day. The Haditha massacre was a travesty that resounds with the Mai Lai massacre of the Vietnam war. Although I do not condone nor support such actions, I can understand why they did those horrid things. Imagine, if you will; seeing your best friends die in front of you. A violent death to those whom you call 'Brother' or 'Sister'. Try to picture a place where you are not permitted to do certain things that could ultimately protect you and your comrades in battle, but these same rules do not apply to the enemy. Think of it as 'Dodgeball' where you can't dodge or move, but your opponents can at will. Not very fair, is it?

PTSD afflicts a good 75% of our returning military personnel, and the number is growing. Even though counseling and talk groups are available, somethings you can't forget. Certain things can set these images and memories off. A certain reminiscing can trigger a flashback or that emotion you felt when it had happened. For the longest time, I had a hard time dealing with overhead fans, because it reminded me of a burning helicopter crashing near our perimeter. I had an even worse time with fireworks and firecrackers, the sounds of battle. It's a scary and upsetting experience and it leaves you feeling vulnerable, insecure and ashamed.

I do not support the war, I do support the troops. I believe that this war should end soon, for the sake of conserving our righting strength. At times, I wish I was back over there, for each day in my civilian life, I feel as though I'm abandoning my 'Brothers in arms'. But I've fought my war, I know this, I know my war is over. And yet, when I see or hear of soldiers dying, I can't help but cry for them. That ever present feeling and thought...

"If I had been there, they may have had a chance."

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