Letting Go and Holding On - Comments

Life is precious

reading the part about where your grandmother saw her dad, i'd say she is in a happy place really as when my mothers aunty was on the brink of death, she was telling my mum and the other relatives to move out the way for what i think were the angels of death.
my mum has also had a few dreams in where her aunty and some relatives who are dead from my mothers side there, all dressed in white and all smiling.

i hope your grandmother r.i.p
:D

I must say that (though not too recently) I have lost an aunt and an grandfather. I don't remember too well when it was, as my memory has turned to ... crap lately. I know how extrememely hard it is, although I probably wasn't as attached to my aunt and grandfather as much as you were attached to grandmother. I really... really hope that... I don't even know what to say. Feel better soon, kay? And it's alright to cry, you have my virtual shoulder to cry on if needed. (I hope you found this comment somewhat comforting. @_@; )

Okay..tears haha. I don't usually cry but that was deep and i am almost jealous of how good your memories seem of you and your grandma. I felt like you opened up and tore my heart. Itwas a brick wall, this is kind of odd but i think you have just impacted me so much with that little journal. I feel for you, and i feel for you even more because I have never gone through death that thoroughly. She sounded like an awesome woman and sometimes Bad things happen to good people, which i dont get at all haha but a couple years ago my dad died and i have never really talked to anyone about it that has gone through this, sometimes people dont realize how big of a deal it is. I mean they might smile and sympathize but they never have to live in a moment where you expect them to be there and there not. Im not saying its bad that they havent cause god bless, and they might try to feel but they dont really get it, and i would do anything to stop them from feeling it. I am so sorry and I hope you are doing well now, and no question. You know where she is now.

I started crying as I read this. I am very sorry for your loss. I'll be honest, I don't know what to say besides that I am sorry.

My condolences on losing your grandmother.

I know this is like a month late, but I know it feels just like yesterday to you that the event happened. Like most, i will not say I am sorry. But, I will let you know that i empathize with you. I know exactly how it feels. I recently just lost my grandmother myself. Like yours she was ALWAYS there, whenever I needed her or not. The road of moving on will be a hard one. You will find that there are so many things that remind you of her, and your time spent. But just remember, as you said, she lived her life.

and when ever you feel the need, cry, vent, just get it out of your system. It hurts to bottle it up. I'm speaking from experience. You can over come the pain that you feel over her loss.

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart)
i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)

i fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)
i want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

-e.e. cummings

I know this message is coming a long while after you posted your journal entry, but I wanted to say I know how that goes. I watched my Aunt -- for most of my life -- suffer through kidney failure. She also went through dialysis for many years and it actually resulted in her losing both her legs. It is not a fun affair, especially saying goodbye. I know the sadness it brings having to look them in the eyes and stay strong. I hope that since she has passed, rest her soul, you have been doing better. I also know you will never forget her, but thats just it about someone you love passing, a part of them stays with you forever. Again, my heart is with you and your family.

I am so sorry. i hpe it gets better. It is kinda hard, ive lost people my self, but keep in mind the awesome memories u 2 had. Im sorry.

It really sucks when I hear stories like this--because I can't feel for anyone. I mean, I'd feel sad for them, maybe shed a few tears, but I've never lost anyone... Though I'm pretty close to losing my step grammy. I'm not close to her, though....

I've never gone throught anything like what you're going through right now and I doubt that what I would want to hear is sorry, but I am sorry. Of course we all completely understand you not writing right away, take all the time you need, I hope things start to look up for you soon, don't forget to smile :]

Stay strong hun. I can see where you get the inspiration for Gen's mother.

Good luck, and I hope you feel better soon. Life will go on, weather you want it to or not, so just get past the sadness and enjoy it while you can :)

I know that the last thing you want right now is sympathy, because that's not gonna bring her back, and that's what you really want right now. I was in exactly the same position as you a few years ago, when I was barely 10. I grew up with my nan around constantly because she lived with me too, she looked after me as a baby, when I was sick and/or had nightmares, but she's in a better place and is probably much more comfortable, and, you'll see her again someday. :)
She wouldn't want you to grieve, she'd want you to celebrate her life for the amazing person I'm sure she was:-).

I know saying that I'm sorry doesnt even begin to cover what you must feel right now. I personally, cannot understand as i ve never lost a person close to me, But I can feel your pain, and your love for her overflowing in what you wrote. Your post , does incredible justice to her. The greatest thing you could have done for her was simply remember, but whats more is, you've shared her with all of us, now she can be remembered by people who've never even met her. She is so lucky to have someone like you who can so personally, so uniquely, and so beautifully represent her place in your life. Im sure shes very happy wherever she is now.

Take all the time you need, everyone will still be here when you get back.

I... am so sorry. I know that saying "sorry" doesn't do anything but I still am. I kind of know what you're going through because I grew up with my grandma, too. And for those 8 years I never really knew why she slept so much or why I didn't see her sometimes. Then when I went to the hospital one day I saw that she was in a bed surrounded by my cousins and uncles. I didn't even know what was happening. I saw my parents and sisters cry then I went to go see her. Maybe an hour after I talked to her did she die and that's when I knew.
Oh, how I wish I remembered what she told me.
To this day I still cry. I wish I made more memories. I wish there was more time. But all you have to do is remember all that you can and keep on moving. But never forget.
What I've said probably didn't help much but I hope that you know that this isn't the end. I send you my condolences. And take all the time that you need.
I'm sorry.

Thank you so much to all of you--people have been so kind, and I cannot tell you what it means to me that complete strangers would reach out to me like this. I've loved hearing stories about your grandparents, too--it's nice to read these glimpses into the lives of these lovely people that were close to you and made such an impact on your life. Thank you. From the bottom of my heart.

losing someone that close to you is tough... i lost my great grandmother not to long ago.. two days after Christmas, the day we came back from my moms mother and fathers. it was hard and still miss her telling me stories and telling me to carry on. she is the only member of my family that TRULY knew when i was not okay, the only one who asked about that fading mark on my ankle, let alone noticed. she did not judge, just cleared all the pill bottles and magazines off her bed and had me curl up with her so she could hold me in her feeble arms so she could coo me to sleep... i get where your coming from, although my situation is not exactly like yours. take all the time you need love, i understand. my condolences. keep the faith.

I"m really sorry for your loss.
My grandpap died last year and I had a really tough time for a while.
He was my favorite person ever, and even though he hadn't really been here been here for a while, it was still tough. I used to spend hours with him in the garrage, just watching him work on his cars. When he died it was like I had lost my best friend. When I saw him in the funeral home it just hit me that he was really gone.
But anyways, I just wanted to say sorry and that I think the newspaper is overated anyway. You should put her obituary up on Mibba.