September 3rd, 2010 at 02:01am
That's how I felt when I was your age.
Today, I'm 19 and I'm glad I'm alive.
Thinking that way never got me anywhere, it only deepened my depression and now, after all the years of constant misery, I finally started to pick myself up.
I've missed out so much because of this, including my education.
I suggest you talk to your parents, no matter what your financial state is. There are still other options than therapy, if you can't afford it. There are support groups, you can talk to your school concealer, google hotlines for teens in distress.
It helps a great deal if you can talk to someone about it.
But let me tell you something, you'll never feel truly loved, until you learn how to love yourself, but you've got to figure out how to do that by yourself.
My family has been through financial issues ever since I can remember. I've had to move houses three times in two years because of money issues. It's very hard to be the child in that situation because there's virtually nothing you can do to help. But, you should know that if your family is going through that trouble, they really probably need you to be there for them and you can't do that if you commit suicide.
Also, I've been overweight all my life. I've gone through a period where I starved myself all day and then ate at night. That made me gain more weight. And I've tried only eating on meal a day. It's not a good thing to do. Initially, you might lose weight but by not eating you're completely slowing down your metabolism. You need your metabolism to be working in order to lose weight. I know for a fact if you're in the mindset that only eating once works that me telling you eating three healthy meals a day isn't going to convince you. And I totally understand where you're coming from. So if you need to talk to someone, you can message me. Hope you feel better soon.