It's really hard to forgive the people who change your life, especially in such a graphic and horrible way. I think it's amazing that you could forgive her, but I hope you really have, because it's even harder to say you've forgiven her and then realize that you still can't look at her without remembering what she caused. :/
If you haven't, then embrace that. Be angry, be sad, be... every emotion you're feeling until you get it all out and realize that you just can't be all those things anymore. Forgive her for you, not because she deserves it.
If you haven't, then embrace that. Be angry, be sad, be... every emotion you're feeling until you get it all out and realize that you just can't be all those things anymore. Forgive her for you, not because she deserves it.