You literally described what I've been going through this past month. Exactly what I've been thinking about nonstop of every day. It's actually kind of freaky in my opinion, but at least there's someone out there who shares my thought process.
I'm currently depressed (and on an antidepressant,) though it seems like what I'm feeling is how I should be from now on. What you said here: "I don't want to be depressed, but I feel like letting go of my depression would mean that I'm satisfied with a life that is not good enough. But what is good enough? Nothing would be good enough," is how I remind myself of my condition.
As for happiness, I agree with you in thinking it is fleeting. I'm constantly bringing myself down from any uplifting that occurs because there's the reality that it won't last, and that something could possibly shatter it and make me feel even more pain in life.
My family is trying to make me "normal" again, but I'm starting to believe that how I used to live was a lie. This is how I should be, even if it's so negative...
Okay, so there's this song I know called 'Happiness' (ironically enough), which seems to describe our situation. Lately the song's been growing on me, and now that I looked at the lyrics again, I can see why. I recommend giving it a listen, if you're open to it
I'm currently depressed (and on an antidepressant,) though it seems like what I'm feeling is how I should be from now on. What you said here: "I don't want to be depressed, but I feel like letting go of my depression would mean that I'm satisfied with a life that is not good enough. But what is good enough? Nothing would be good enough," is how I remind myself of my condition.
As for happiness, I agree with you in thinking it is fleeting. I'm constantly bringing myself down from any uplifting that occurs because there's the reality that it won't last, and that something could possibly shatter it and make me feel even more pain in life.
My family is trying to make me "normal" again, but I'm starting to believe that how I used to live was a lie. This is how I should be, even if it's so negative...
Okay, so there's this song I know called 'Happiness' (ironically enough), which seems to describe our situation. Lately the song's been growing on me, and now that I looked at the lyrics again, I can see why. I recommend giving it a listen, if you're open to it