reassurance

Right- i am the youngest of three. I have always felt that my older brother has been a favourite with my mum, and , for years, its pissed me off.
(For example when my brother was hitting me i yelled at him and my mum said to me 'leave him alone he's only teasing you')

I wanted to be more important in my mums eyes and, yes, i know she loves all her children equally and its all in my head, but she seems to be more outspoken about her love for my brother.

About three weeks ago my brother went to university and i was the only teenager left in the house and i was thinking 'great, some attention for me'. I was wrong though. My mum broke her leg so she doesn't see it fit to talk to me other than when shes ordering me around. 'do this' 'do that' 'get dinner started' 'you can do your coursework later- make me some tea'.

i love my mum but sometimes i feel as if she doesn't want me around. Once I've done something for her she'll say 'why don't you go upstairs' or 'you better get your coursework started- off you go'. We don't have the best relationship but what mother and daughter do? Its like she hates me, and, yes, i know she doesn't, but thats just what i feel.

And to top it all off- i miss my brother terribly. I have no-one to talk to about anything! I kind of wish he was back home.

i guess i just need some reassurance.

sorry about this- its a bit moany and depressing- i just need a way to vent.
xx