You Wanna Learn Some Interesting Things?

I’m in the process of learning some of the hardest lesson’s I’ll ever learn. I don’t really care what ANYONE says, keeping the walls up is MUCH safer then letting people in, because all they ever seem to do is stick around long enough to knock them down, before using what they’ve learnt to rip you apart piece by piece.

I’m learning that it doesn’t matter how much people try not to let you down they still do. Relationships are sorta like block towers, and it doesn’t matter how carefully, slowly and gently you try to pull the bottom block out the whole tower will still come crumbling down, so just pull the fucking supports out already would you. That’s all I ask of people, that they don’t try to be nice while pulling those supports out just to save face, and those people know who they are.

I’m learning that putting those walls back up is a lot harder than letting people pull them down, and while I realise that they won’t ever be as strong as they used to be, I need those walls to go back up.

I know everyone says not to bottle stuff up, because you’re just going to let it all out later on, and abuse the wrong people, but I don’t care. It’s the second best method that I’ve found, the first being something I’m trying my hardest to stay away from, and it’s definitely the safest.

I’m learning that people really are cruel in the most creative ways they can come up with. I’m learning that I rely on the stars a lot more than I ever thought I would to lose my thoughts in. I’m learning that I’m not as strong as I’ve let myself and everyone else believe. I’m learning a lot of things, but the biggest lesson I’ve learnt so far, is that trusting and loving people really does hurt just as much and so much more than anyone’s ever told me.

Sure sometimes things have to fall apart in order for you to realise just how much you need them to fall back together again, but what happens when they won’t fall back together again?

Sometimes it’s easier for me to pretend rather than face my feelings. Sometimes it’s easier to try to make it alone rather than risk getting hurt again. Sometimes it’s easier to be numb towards certain people so I don’t let them get too close. Sometimes I’m scared, but when I act numb towards you, it doesn’t mean I don’t care. It means I care too much.
It’s not just sometimes anymore, it’s always…

Comment, or don't comment, I honestly don't care anymore...There's no point, cause caring alone isn't enough...