Am I desperate?

My boyfriend Josiah ..Ex boyfriend dumped me round a month ago
only because he had too.. Because his Mum told him he had too..
Im her drama student, long story short, shes afraid that he'd dump me and ill quit drama.
Now its so awkward between us, He just ignores me, every time at drama.. He doesnt even say hi.
I dont know if thats just cause hes trying to get over me, or he wants nothing to do with me but I just can't think straight without him.. I feel like im dying, we were so inlove, he was the kind people called perfect..Absolutely nothing wrong with him.
I want to talk to him..But then again, that could ruin everything, even the chance of us being able to be friends again.

Im also struggling with weight issues.. Its a huge down fall in my self esteem, speaking from someone with depression it pretty much sucks..
Ive been on this low carb diet, no snacks and less than 4 carbs a day.. Pretty boring menu and most of which is meat. The diet works because I know tuns of have lost heaps just on the first week... Ive been on it for two weeks and I notice no difference, its extremely upsetting because Im just dying to wear a bikini infront of Josiah.. Weird as that seems..