Jesus, Mary and Joseph--WTF?!?!?!

Dude, I remember when life was staying at my aunt's house and running around the horseshoe, not a damn care in the world just playing tag and fighting with my cousins.

Now it's random crying out in public and chest pains and mood swings like a mo'.

When the fuck did my life get so complicated? When did I fall apart and fail to pull it back together? When did I lose control? Me? The girl who raised her baby sister, boxed her mom on a nightly basis and got beat up at school constantly yet my family never knew I was unhappy. I used to handle anything, I could do everything, I was great.

Now I cry randomly for no reason (and sometimes for good reason) I get so nervous about every day things I find myself sweating and wringing my hands till they hurt, and I can't sleep to save my life. I have shit loads of advice to give everyone else, I can help them all right, but I can't figure out what to do with myself. I used to take Xanax for my anxiety, but I quit cause I never have time to see my doctor and I'm out. I thought I was fine without it, but I'm starting to wonder. My behavior can't be it? Maybe I'm over reacting...

I need a vacation....
May 1st, 2007 at 02:22am