It's A Sickening Feeling

Everything has been going so well, but now my dad had two more seizures tonight and I can't help but worry that something is wrong again. He's going to St. Luke's and I doubt I'll be in school tomorrow, whether he's admitted or not. I just feel sick. I can't help but to cry since I'm alone and I've already been through this before. It feels like de ja vous, however you spell it.
Everything else is taking a backseat for the moment. I know it probably shouldn't be like that since life goes on, but that's just how it is. I can make my classes up and it's a Friday tomorrow, so it'll be fine.

I just can't believe he's having a setback like this. The doctor was ready to release him from work, but it's too far away, so he didn't. It had been six months since the beginning of all this and he's seemed to have been doing pretty well overall. But now this is a really big setback and I just pray that everything will be okay this time like it ended up being last time. I hate to cry because it doesn't help antyhing, but I rarely cry, so I don't care, I'm crying dammit!

All the small things seem so much stupider when something bad has happened. They just seem pointless, yet so many people thrive on them. It just doesn't make sense how they can be the center of attention all the time.

To top it off, doctors were hard to get a hold of and take forever to call back. I understand there are other patients, but sometime soon would be nice.

I just...I can't help but worry and I feel like I'm making myself sick, which is the last thing I should be doing. At least I was home when he said he wasn't feeling well, unlike last time.

He has to be okay. He has to be.