My Guy

I think I love this guy named luis. Me and him dated in the past and he loved me(which i didnt know by the way) so before you call me stupid and bad hear me out!

I cheated on luis at a summer camp...ROTC camp to be percise. and i regreted it ever since...me and luis didnt talk after our breakup and now i realize the stupid riff i have caused between me and luis. i didnt reallyu talk to him until five months after our breakup...i really like hima dn he says he still likes me but i dont know what else to say to him to truly tell him that I care. i write poems and only a few of them he gets to read, I write letters to him explaining how i feel about him, i talk to him for hours on the phone, and yet he doesnt see me the way i would like him to. and yes I bet yopu all are saying "haha this is all you r fault", but i hate myself over this whole situation. i love luis and i hate that it took so long for me to really see it. i let the most amazing guy out of my life and for what? One small kiss? I am a selfish and greedy peroson and I guess I dont deserve a second chance or a guy that a good girl should have. I know I wont ever hurt luis again but....its complicated and he is confused. He is going with human nature and trying to protect himself but i wish he wud let his guard down that way he can see the person i am not and not the person i was over the summer! i need some advice...please?

I know there are spelling errors in this...im sorry u guys im just so upset!