Have you felt like you weren't you?

Okay sometimes I feel like I'm not me when I'm at school.Because sometimes I feel like am some else.I'm not crazy or anything but I'm saying that I just don't feel the same.Usually I would be saying something weird and random like I would say 'Chicken' out of no where.An all my class mate laugh at me for saying that.One of my friend see that sometimes I'm not me because she already nows me.She would ask me if I'm okay and I would say I'm fine but...I'm not.

This all started when my grandpa was rushed into the hospital I got bad panic attacks.Where I won't talk to anyone and start shivering like if I was locked up in freezer.Sure I could see every one but I couldn't hear them.It was like I was lost in my head trying my best to ignore everything that was going on and that work.But my family very worried about.One of my aunts said I need to go to therapist.

Everything was just so stressful.I never like being in hospital when one of my family members is in them.To tell you the truth I hate hospital just hate them.Then after my grandpa past away I just don't feel like me.I stopped saying random things and I've bin silence.I usually get in trouble at home but I stopped.I bin getting annoyed real easily.That is not normal I've bin the one getting people annoyed at me!But no now people are annoying me!

I keep telling myself that it's just fad and I'll be back to weirdness.But what if that doesn't happen and I stay like for all my life?I like my old self and people around me like my old self too.They say 'Why aren't you saying anything today?'.People listen to me when I'm quiet and acting like a goody two shoes you should slap me and wake me up!Because I'm not like that!If one of my friends need my help.I would try my best to help them.But if they don't that for me I would just blow them off!

I have two side to me a nice(a.k.a goody two shoes) and my bad side(a.k.a dark side).My nice shows once and a while where I just stay quiet and my dark side well I don't do bad thing like steal or Vandals.My dark side likes to play tricks and hide peoples stuff.Okay if someone gets me mad I would get revenge like hide there backpack or tell them Carma is going to get them.An when Carma hits I tell the 'Told you' and walk off with a small grin on my face.

Okay at the end I feel bad for them but they get what they get.But I just feel the same I look the same but don't feel the same.