I just want to pull my hair out

Okay so like back in October my Gram had cancer removed form her colon, and for like six weeks I was at her house every weekend. In December she started 2 months of chemo and radiation.

Three weeks ago she stopped eating food, and just intaking liquids for fear of vomiting (not that she actually had). Last week she was admitted to the local hospital because her blood wouldn't clot when she had some taken for testing. Turns out that the prescribed blood thinner she has been taking must have food otherwise it builds up and blood becomes too thin. No one told us this. She's in a lot of pain.a lot of it in her mouth which is what is preventing her from really eating now, I'm serious in the last two days she's had OJ, apple sauce, a couple Popsicles, and some slices of orange.

I went to see her yesterday after school because the hospital is just down the street from my school, and I love my Gram. There I was informed the she had an untreated UTI which is what was causing most of her pain. Funny thing is we told the doctor at the cancer treatment place that she'd been having a burning feeling when she peed, and asked them if they could run a test for a bladder infection, so they "did", and it came back negative.

And the doctors are all blaming each other, the chemo guy says its the radiation, the radiation guys says it's the chemo. The general doctor at the hospital says the mouth stuff was from the chemo.

Well last night her heart stopped a couple times for a few beats, and they want to give her a pace maker in two or three days. She's almost eighty-fucking-fours years old, can she survive that?

I haven't told anybody. I was going to tell my best friend but he hasn't been on since I got home from taking care of my Gram's dog over the weekend so my uncle could go home and get his mail and stuff. I really needed to get it out, because I'm so stressed out.
January 28th, 2009 at 03:10am