Stupid Stupid Stupid.

So the girl that told herself to be careful, to not fall in love, to guard her heart and be realistic managed to fall into the hugest high school cliche in the book.

The little sophomore girl falls deeply in love with the first guy she has sex with (who happens to be a senior) and now he's freaking out and doesn't know what he's going to do with the rest of his life. He breaks up after five months and easily moves on to college parties in hot girls' dorm rooms with all his guy friends that graduated last year while she mopes around not being able to do anything or go anywhere because she's only fifteen. Of course, the guy is almost nineteen and able to do whatever he wants.

So I know I'm ranting. And every time I read something about a girl whining about her ex boyfriend, i want to punch her in the face and tell her to grow up and get over him. But right now, I'm mad at myself for not listening to the me of six months ago saying "don't love him because he's going away this year." "don't love him just because you slept with him after a week." (I don't regret it, but i wouldn't recommend it, btw.) because i let myself get close to him when i thought we'd be together longer than most high school couples. We were, if you're thinking about the fact that most high school relationships last three or four months. But i was thinking we'd be together until fall, when he actually started college. But no, he doesn't want to
let ourselves get that far and have it hurt worse.

I don't think this could hurt any worse.

See?! EFFING CLICHE!!!

so any words of wisdom about moving on? or better yet, any good lesbian novels and movies to suggest?

thanks for any input and for reading through my relationship crap.