Misery

My life is miserable. So here I am, spilling my guts on some silly teen writing website.

Okay. I'm fifteen, I have a boyfriend, first boyfriend I've ever had. He had this awesome, hair, like fire. Naturally straight. Once upon a time, it was quite long. He plays drums, he has this room with a lot of expensive equipment in it at the moment. I can't listen to him play for long, his drums are so darn loud and it sounds unnatural without guitar.

Anyway back to his hair. I love it. He got it cut once sadly before we started going out, drunk, of course he let his friends do it. Maybe three months after he got it cut again, he had a mullet for a night. I had nightmares after I saw him that day. Thank god he got it cut off.
About five days ago he got drunk again and his friends shaved his head, he has a small Mohawk now that looks horrible. That's not a problem for me though, no way.

I'm still entirely attracted to this guy, and I can't even figure out why. It's crazy, I could be with anyone in the world.
I love him so much, we got a little intimate, illegally, he is eighteen.
My parents found out, they were shocked. They told me I wasn't allowed to see him again. I cried all of Saturday. They have taken my phone off me too.
I just want to talk to him, but I can't.
I'm empty, I don't know what's happening to me. Total out of body experience.

I don't even know how he's coping, or if he's coping at all. Or even if he cares.

This sucks.