Words of Wisdom From No One That Matters - Practical Thinking and Relationships

I’ve come to realize that when it comes to relationships, neither party involved has the ability to think rationally and practical. What is it about relationships that turn your brain to complete mush? What is it that compels someone to not be able to make proper decisions regarding the rest of their lives?

Have relationships been completely reduced to being slightly less idiotic than when a man racks himself in the nuts for the amusement of others?

A friend of mine is engaged to be married to a man she’s known for almost a year. (This apparently seems to be quite the trend lately seeing as many people spend barely a year together before they think, hey, let’s spend the rest of out lives together in utter disappointed bliss!) But before I get into all that, let’s talk about how it all started.

My friend called me up and told me that this guy she hadn’t seen since she met him five years ago at a carnival he was working for stopped her in Wal-Mart and asked for her number. Not even a day later he called and asked her out for Friday night. She asked me and my other friend to tag along cause she was a little scared to go on the date alone with him.

That should have been her first sign… right?

So we crashed her date and while his outside smoking, she tells me that he told her that he was sick.

“what kind of sick?” I asked her.

“He says his bi-polar Schizophrenic.” She replied.

Needless to say, my ‘Ruuuuun Biiitch, Run’ meter went off in my head and I told her that this probably wasn’t the best choice for her and seeing as she is highly prone to sex on the first date, I told her not to sleep with him, or you’ll never get rid of him in the event that, indeed, he was a psycho.

What does she do?

Fucks him in the car on the way of taking him home, because he doesn’t have a license because of his illness.

The next day we go to her house for her Step Dad’s b-day party and guess who’s there? The Bi-Po Schizo. Her whole family is having a cow because they tend to over react to things and they’re yelling at her about the man and we’re trying to get in a decent conversation with her about him while he’s in the other room.

“He said last night, after we were done having sex, that he was a virgin.” She stated. Me and my other friend look at each other and I burst into laughter.

“and you believed him?” I asked her.

“I was a bit skeptical at first, but he sounded so sincere and he even cried.”

“He… cried?” my other friend asked.

“What a fucking freak.” I stated.

Needless to say, some time in the near future, he finally came out and said he lied to her about being a virgin. What a jack ass… I know.

So a few days later, she decides she still wants to see him and all that and her family has the biggest fucking cow saying that he was a leech and that he would only bring her down and use her and what have you, but of course, she doesn’t listen.

Needless to say the weeks go on and on and she drops him off to go to a job interview one night and he never comes back home. She called me and my friend while we were at a concert.

“James hasn’t come home yet.”

“Where did he go?”

“I dropped him off that the metro link so he could catch the train to his job interview last
night.”

“Did you call them and ask if he made it?”

“Yeah, they said he never showed up…”

“Ok well have you talked to his mom about it?”

“She said he always goes missing for days at a time, but he has all those seizures and things. What if he’s hurt?”

So, I told her to talk to the cops and what have you since it had been more than 24hrs. A few days later, still no sign of him, we were at her sisters house attempting to make Missing flyers when Erica gets a text from the fuck tard saying that he was in Chi Town and he just got home a few hours ago.

Needless to say, a phone conversation and in person verbal conflict happened for almost three hours. His excuse?

“We were fighting that entire day and I was upset and when that happens I run.”
Seriously?

So, he was finally on my ‘ass clown’ list.

After a few days, they got back together and of course, the ‘shit hit the fan’ yet again.

We went to a concert, and on the way there, she called me to tell me that Brittany (her sister) and her douche bag baby daddy were following them to beat up James. So we ended up stopping at a gas station and called the cops in the local area and a bit scene was made and I had a little verbal throw down with James cause he was screaming at me about how I needed to shut up because it wasn’t my family that was being threatened and what have you.

And let me just say one thing, no one, NO ONE, shouts at me and gets by with it…

So, after that incident, her mother kicked her out of the house for not breaking up with him, so she moved in with him and his mother. A month or so later, he invites us to come hang out with him and a local bar we always hangout at on Fridays and when she gets there we find out that he wanted us all there because he was going to purpose to her. And he gives her a ring that she herself is paying for… a 4,000 dollar ring that is…

Not but maybe a week later, he gets into a fight with his step dad and brothers and gets them both kicked out of the house and now they have no where to go. So she’s currently staying at her dad’s house and he’s on the street cause no one wants to put up with him.

He’s whiney and possessive and I don’t like the way he talks to her.

I keep telling her that he has issues… and until he works out his issues he’s just going to continue to be that needy little jerk that throws a diva fit every time he doesn’t get what he wants from her. But she doesn’t want to hear it. She never wants to hear it.
So now they’re looking for a place to get together….

Together?

He doesn’t have a job. All he does is drink and smoke pot. He’s completely useless at the moment.

Not to mention, he’s too immature to handle having his own place. She doesn’t make that much money and he’s always wanting to go out all the time, and I keep telling her, if you’re really wanting to do this, you’re going to have to sit down and explain how things work in the real world to him. Explain, power bills and water bills and grocery money to him. Car payments and insurance. Rent. He can’t go out and party anytime he wants. He can’t waste money on pot and alcohol anymore. And that he’s going to have to grow some balls and maintain a decent job without reducing himself back down to lazy ass wipe.

“I know I know.” Was all she could say.

This brings me to the whole point of this story.

People in love are idiots. If this is what happens when you’re ‘in love’, if you’re mind gets so fucking clouded that you think its ok to cater to a fuck tard who just wants someone to take care of him the rest of his life, instead of you realizing that you both are and deserve better than the way you’re being treated, then I don’t want to be in love.

I don’t want to fall helpless and victim to some asshole.

It’s not worth it in my view.

She’s just going to get hurt in the end. So I’m going to sit back and watch her walk down the aisle. I’m going to sit back and watch her pop out of few kids. I’m going to sit back and watch her go through a depressing divorce and then I’m going to sit there with a big sign with the words ‘I TOLD YOU SO!’ written on it.

Stupid girls.

I’ve always said I was never going to get married. I’ve always said I don’t need a useless piece of paper telling me it’s ok to be with the one I love without some immoral stamp on my back. I don’t believe in marriage in general and now I really think it’s just a disease that’s spreading like the plague and killing off any real logical thinking left in the world.

I’ll keep my practical nature intact thank you and just live in sin like the rest of the world does.

I’m not sure if any of this really mad any sense cause I was just kind of babbling through most of it… but I hope I sort of got my point across… if not, then just ignore me… lol.

:) Ata.