THIS IS MY OPINION. PLEASE DON'T KILL ME. IT WAS NOT MEANT TO OFFEND ANYONE.
1. ...hearing any of the following noises immediately perks your interest: static, a heart monitor, or faint explosions.
1)STATIC = TV DEAD= ME SAD
2) HEART MONITER = HOSPITAL = NORMAL
3) FAINT EXPLOSIONS = WAR/DEATH= RUN AWAY-
So, NO. These noises do not "perk my interest".
2. ...someone says, "No fucking way!" and the first thing you think it, "Aw, that sucks; he's still on his honeymoon too!"
*shakes head* No, Just no.
3. ...you boycott Aqua Teen Hunger Force because there is NO WAY it is better than The Breakfast Monkey.
That is offensive to me because:
1) I absolutely love the show ATHF.
2) The Breakfast Monkey was obviously very similar to ATHF/ bad enough that Cartoon Network didn't want it.
4. ...you know which member of the band makes Bob Bryar's heart burn.
Bob Bryar has GERD now?
5. ...you really DO know what they do to guys like them in prison.
Not really considering I've never BEEN TO PRISON.
6. ...you, too, were killing before killing was cool.
Nope, not really because that's ILLEGAL.
7. ...you know that homophobia is gay and that Frank Iero is "a monster".
1)Those two statements have nothing to do with each other.
2)This is offensive to me because:
-By saying homophobia is "gay", you are using the same "insult" that homophobes use when they call someone "gay".
-By saying homophobia is "gay", you are saying it is happy and therefore it is a "good thing".
8. ...you raise your hand in history class when the teacher is talking about the astroid that killed the dinosaurs and say, "Ah, but that fucking astroid missed the Torosaurus!"
That would make me look like a psychotic retard.
9. ...you know that pears really ARE good organic.
What does that have to do with MCR?
10. ...thanks to that one fan letter session, you know the meaning of the phrase "haute couture."
Not really. It just shows me that Gerard Way and Bert McCracken don't know what haute couture means.
11. ...you have begun at least one conversation with, "What's the worst that I could say?"
12. ...you have ended at least one conversation with, "So long and goodnight."
Those are phrase that are used commonly in conversation. It doesn't make you special.
13. ...after the release of The Black Parade, you began referring to you mother as either "Mama" or "Mother War" whenever you got mad at her.
I refered to my mother as Mama before I heard that song and I never refer to ANYONE as "Mother War".
14. ...you know that there are teenagers, and then there is "Teenagers."
Teenagers is a song that (to me) accurately describes teenage life. Where is there a difference?
15. ...you still mourn the death of Pansy.
Pansy is an object that can be replaced. Why would I mourn it?
16. ...you can make the connection between the phrase "back in black" and Gerard Way's hair.
Back in Black is an AC/DC song not Gerard Way's hair.
17. ...you keep an eye out for a certain bum everytime you go to San Francisco.
Wow. Why would I look for hobos?
18. ...you find it extremely ironic that the guys used to be baffled as to why so many people thought they were vampires, but you read the warning against illegal copying on the first CD.
No one thought they were vampires. Don't flatter yourselves.
19. ...you can make the connection between the letters "NJ" and the inside of the lower lip.
New Jersey is a state not Frank Iero's lip.
20. ...you support Bob Bryar's solo project.
I don't even KNOW what it is. Why would I support it?
21. ...you crossed out "Halloween" on your calendar and replaced it with "Frank Iero's Birthday."
I wouldn't cross it out just because someone's birthday happens to be on it. Halloween is a holiday, Frank Iero's birthday is not.
22. ...you crossed out "New Year's Eve" on your calendar and replaced it with "Bob Bryar's Birthday."
See number 21.
23. ...you look out your window on a rainy day, see all the people with umbrellas, and think, "Wow, the Academy is really growing!"
That doesn't have anything to do with MCR. It has everything to do with Gerard Way, but not the band.
24. ...you have unleashed the fucking bats.
You forgot to put the word death in front of bats.
25. ...you find it extremely funny that a certain guitarist who cannot swim totally rocks at the song "Drowning Lessons."
1)That is a song, not a body of water.
2)I find it sad that he is in his late 20's and cannot swim.
26. ...when you heard Gerard got engaged, you thought to yourself, "Huh, I guess he DID go off to "find another Way."
Worst pun I ever heard.
27. ...when someone asks you how you are feeling when you are sad, you respond, "I'm not okay."
That doesn't make any sense. It so out of the ordinary to say....
28. ...you have taken duct tape and a sharpie to your street sign and changed the street name to Cemetery Drive.
That is also illegal. I didn't know so many MCR fans wanted to go to jail.
29. ...someone offers to tell you a riddle and you ask, "That depends...is it that riddle of revenge?"
That person is most likely a rapist.
30. ...there is only one saint that you worship, and that is the Patron Saint of Switchblade Fights.
If you worship a metaphor, then you may be a bit crazy.
31. ...when you are sick of your face, you are allowed to be sick of your face, cuz it's your fucking face.
Okay.. I don't think anyone would think it's NOT your face..
32. ...you hear the word "bunny" and think of a cat.
Someone didn't teach you the word "Bunny".
33. ..."Traitors!"...
What?
34. ...you actually KNOW how to pronounce Frank Iero's last name ("eye-ear-oh").
Um, I'm sure a lot of people do.
35. ...when breaking up with someone, you have used the line, "Honey, this mirror isn't big enough for the two of us."
I don't think anyone who would think of saying that even has a boyfriend/girlfriend.
36. ...when someone breaks up with YOU, you have shouted after them, "You didn't even have the guts to say, 'I don't love you like I loved you yesterday,' you ***!"
That's probably why they broke up with you.
37. ...someone mentions angels and you think, "Headfirst for halos!"
Nope.
38. ...you wonder why the anthem didn't explain it, anyway.
That doesn't make any sense. AGAIN.
39. ...you have done or died.
I didn't do anything and I'm still alive, so....
40. ...everytime you are faced with a difficult descision, you think to yourself, "Could I? Should I?"
Doesn't everyone?
41. ...you know that celebrities die by threes.
See number 38.
42. ...you know that dead cartoon people are not the only ones who can have X's over their eyes.
Um, duh?
43. ...you don't keep any garlic or a crucifix around because you know that vampires will never hurt you.
Vampires don't exist.
44. ...everytime you play cards, you remove the "wild-eyed jokers" from the deck.
There's no such thing as a "wild -eyed joker".
45. ...you can go skydiving because you lost your "fear of falling."
How much therapy did that take?
46. ...you hear anything that relates to William Shakespeare, and the first words in your head are "Juliet loves the beat and the lust it commands..."
Guilty.
47. ...any guy ever comes up and asks for a *** show and you spit in his face and yell, "***. YOU!"
I think every girl that's not a complete wh**e would too.
48. ...you hear the beginning of an MCR song on the radio and think, "Oh baby here comes the sound!"
Why would you need to consciously think that?
49. ...after The Black Parade came out, you changed your zodiac sign to Cancer.
You can't change your birthday.
50. ...that sound of the drumsticks clicking at the end of "Teenagers" is the TRUE end of the song.
That's obvious.
51. ...all you are is bullets.
I AM NOT A METAPHOR!
52. ...you have walked into a candy store and said, "Gimme all your poison!"
...And then you got kicked out.
53. ...if the employee at the above candy store complied, you responded with, "Thank you for the venom!"
...and then he got thrown in jail.
54. ...you won't go down by yourself, but you'll go down with your friends.
I didn't know you liked threesomes!
55. ...your weapon of choice is a croquet mallet.
Against a gun? Nuh-uh.
56. ...you still can't look at orange crayons without blushing.
I hate the color orange. Why would I blush at it? I think it's an ugly color.
57. ...you have refused to swim in a pool because the lifeguard was "dressed in red and blue"...
Then you are *dingdingding* PSYCHOTIC!
58. ...you know the difference between immortality and never dying.
That means the exact same thing- Do you speak english?
59. ...someone says, "NOW!" and you instinctively respond with, "But I can't!"
Then you get grounded because you're mother is sick of your incompetence.
60. ...for prom, you went up to your friends/date and asked, "Now don't I look pretty walkin' down the street in the best damn dress I own?!"
and your friend says, "That's the best dress you own! Haahahaha! You poor little thing!" and then laughs harder because you don't have a car and you're waking down the street in a dress.
61. ...you aspire to own a Benz someday for the sole purpose of driving ninety past the Barbies and Kens.
That's also illegal. By the way- there's two crimes because there will be dolls all over the road. YOUR DOLLS.
62. ...someone proposes marriage to you, and you look them in the eye and ask, "If you marry me, would you bury me? Would you carry me to the end?"
I don't think they'd want to marry you anymore...
63. ...everytime you see a flock of doves, you instinctively look for a bullet.
Why? Because your a bird-killing ***?
64. ...you've looked in the mirror and not liked what you saw.
I think a-lot of people do sometimes.
65. ...someone asks you how you'd feel if you met MCR, and you respond with, "Tongue-tied and oh so squeamish..."
Squeamish? They carry sharp objects?
66. ...you have wondered what would happen if Little Red Ridinghood heard about track 7 on TBP...
Little red ridinghood doesn't exist!
67. ...you work in a densely-packed office building and have had "Cubicles" on repeat for an hour or more.
Then you got fired at the end of the day.
68. ...when you're in over your head, you have said, "Heaven help us!"
Commonly used phrase- AGAIN.
69. ...someone near you starts smoking, and you play "Cancer" pointedly in their direction.
That's a bit insulting, don't you think.
70. ...every single time you are in an elevator, you immediately check to see if it "only goes up to ten."
*shakes head* My iq is slowly dropping.
71. ...you get pissed off at your boyfriend and tell your friends, "He's not around, he's always looking at men."
You are dating a gay guy. Obviously he doesn't want you.
72. ...you wonder if Gerard singing "Way down" in "Cemetery Drive" has anything to do with the fact that his brother, Mikey, "died" in the video for "The Ghost of You."
OMG- REALLY? Honestly, you just said that? The songs are written before the video comes out. DUH.
73. ...when you're running late for something and your mom or dad says, "We have got to go!" you echo them out of habit and maybe even wave a lighter for dramatic effect.
yeah- got to go to your psycho therapy session.
74. ...any story beginning with "Long ago" immediately causes you to think, "just like the hearse. You. Died to get in again..."
That's a bit sad.
75. ...you do not "light" matches; you "strike" them.
Why do you insist on breaking things!?
76. ...someone says they'll give you anything, and you say, "Fine, how about a thousand bodies piled up?"
Again- PSYCHO!
77. ...you adore every inch of sanity.
I guess alot of people would.
78. ...you don't just stand, you stand up fucking tall!
That would hurt my back if I did that every time I stood.
79. ...you have given out invitations for some event, and you have written on them "Now come one, come all to this tragic affair..."
Even for a wedding/birthday party etc.? Wow.
80. ...screw skinny jeans; what's in is despair!
*raises eyebrows* I didn't know you could were despair.
81. ...you refer to what you get out of those annoying little prize machines that rarely ever hang onto the stuffed animals inside of them as "the winnings."
I guess you could. It doesn't mean you're obsessed.
82. ...the only "Rmy" you're ever joining has an "MC" in front of it,
thankyouverymuch.
SOMEONE doesn't support their country.
83. ...you own Bob Bryar's Book of Cats.
Useless items take up too much space.
84. ...you know that Skeleton Crew does not, repeat, not refer to the undead seadogs of "Pirates of the Caribbean".
Why would it?
85. ...you use "MCR Speak" to mess with people's minds (ex. "Yeah, ever since the breakup, Revenge-5. Seriously, you'd think my ex could've said Parade-6 before he left me for that ***. *** Bullets-1!" in which "Revenge-5" translates to "I'm not okay" and "Parade-6" translates to "I don't love you," and "Bullets-1" translates to "romance".)
That's just stupid.
86. ...in the spirit of the above, your copy of "Life on the Murder Scene" is Parade-2 from so many viewings.
How could watching a DVD so many times destroy it?
87. ...when going to meet Ray Toro, you wear a t-shirt with a picture of a cupcake and the words "We Will Always Remember."
HE probably doesn't even remember that.
88. ...you name your guitars.
A lot of people do.
89. ...you have Lasik surgery, then announce a funeral time and date for your old glasses.
That's just stupid.
90. ...you do not aspire to be famous; you aspire to be Ghostbuster famous.
That's not very famous.
91. ...every time you avenge yourself, you cheer three times.
How can you avenge YOURSELF?
92. ...they are Your Chemical Romance.
But the title is MY Chemical Romance- not YOUR...
93. ...you're an animal that never paid attention in school.
That's why you're a construction worker.
94. ...you are not afraid to walk this world alone.
Obviously you want to be raped.
95. ...you know that certain guitarists should not balance on top of certain drumsets during certain live tv shows.
Guitarists shouldn't do that anyway.
96. ...you rock out just for the dead.
Again- Psychotic. How many times am I gonna have to type this?
97. ...when your significant other calls, you answer with "Hello, angel, tell me where are you?"
I think I'd stop calling if my significant other said that every time I called.
98. ...you only take trains out of New Orleans.
And that make sense why?
99. ...you are a certified "bunk-diver."
That would hurt if you missed.
100. ...you know what a bed of roses and a gun have in common.
Which is nothing..
101. ...you know that the end is only the beginning. Then there's "DEAD!", "This is How I Disappear," "The Sharpest Lives,"...
Yeah.. It's the first song. Duh.
THANK YOU GOD IT'S OVER!
My IQ dropped so low- I think I went brain dead.
Sorry if the answers got boring after a while- I was brain dead.
THIS IS MY OPINION. PLEASE DON'T KILL ME. IT WAS NOT MEANT TO OFFEND ANYONE.
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