I dont know!

So people keep asking me why I'm like this, and honestly I don't know. I didn't sleep last night and I'm going to sleep tonight. Why you may ask.
I have no clue why, my girlfriend of course is worried and wants me to sleep. I won't, and I don't know why, I'm just bringing myself down more, I just stare in the mirror and weep until I end up choking and hyperventalating and hiccuping. I don't know what's wrong with me...I just want to have a better life, I want to live In Ireland with my girlfriend, but no.