I'm a Poser, Pentatonic Scales, and Guitar Stuff.

So today I finally buckled (no pun) and bought the standard punk ("emo" kids use it too) poser studded belt. You know the one:


Now, I know I can only wear this belt if I do NOT wear any other standard punk fashion, such as Converse, wilde hair, and eyebrow piercings, because that's just plain cliché. But I figured if I wore it with my grungy naturally-ripped jeans (I do a lot of sliding on floors and other places...oh and I need new clothes) and velvet-ish totally fashion-slave sexist black conformist jacket with the indie home-made buttons it would work out nicely, and not be poser. And so it shall be. And it doubles as a guitar strap.

Yeah, I analyze stuff way too much, but punk is a cruel master and...God I am so poser. Weirdly enough, the store sold the same belt in brown. Dosenbach is lame! And it's a shoe store. Why were they selling belts?

I also studied some guitar theory and mistakenly learned all about pentatonic scales, which, as it's about six lessons ahead of where I'm supposed to be, I did not understand in the least...until it all became clear in a flash of revelation. But still, don't ask me to explain it.

My guitar is a cheap Strat copy, which is better than a Strat because although the sound is just nowhere near as good, it gives me way more indie-cred points and saves me hundreds of dollars, Swiss francs, and Euros, which I can spend on stuff like plectrums and capos and Gripmasters and drum sticks.

I will always avoid taking the stage with a Gibson or Les Paul, because those brands are so large they probably have child labour hidden in the works somewhere (on that note, I only wear second-hand Converse, more politically-correct power to me!)

I hate my guitar lesson DVDs cos the guy teaching showed how to play an Asus chord and said
"Now you may think, why not just use first, second, and third fingers cos that's much easier,but that's just not how we do it!"
Yeah well, stick your fascist opinions in your juicebox cos everybody knows guitarists do it whichever way works best to get them to the next chord. Suck it!

Wow this post was long. Cheers to whoever actually reads it.
May 28th, 2009 at 08:26pm