Tears

Have you ever worked so hard to do something just to have it not work out right?
Have you ever tried your best, but it still wasn't good enough?
Have you ever practiced your heart out for months only to screw up when the important moment comes?

If you haven't, you're lucky. It sucks.

The reason I randomly decided to post this today is because this is exactly what happened to me not even an hour ago. For all of you that know nothing about me, I'm a dancer. I've been a dancer for as long as I can remember, and I've always loved it.

I work my butt off from September to June to get my dances perfect, and they I got to competitions in April and May to show everyone else how great my company and I are. And then in June, we have recital.

So, today, I had a competition. And I've only done one of my dances so far, but I thought I was gonna kick some butt with it. (The song was La Copa de la Vida by Ricky Martin. If you don't know it, you should check it out.) It's such a great, fun, difficult dance, that I figured there was no way were would perform anything less than perfectly. And everyone else said that we did do it perfectly. But I didn't.

When I messed up the first time, It was only a little fall out of a turn because I tripped over the tape on the stage. I figured, no big deal, and moved on.

And then I did the wrong step. And let me tell you, that's not something I do often. Like never.

And then someone ran into me. And another person stepped on me. And I did the wrong thing again because I was flustered at that point.

So when I got offstage, obviously the very fake smile I was wearing fell off my face and I started crying. I mean, I fixed my mistakes, but there's no way the judges didn't see me, right. My mom said she only noticed me fall out of my turn, but that's her job. I don't believe her.

So, I cried for a while because I don't just feel bad for myself because now I won't get a platinum like I thought I would, but because I let my entire group down by messing up.

Am I right? Or wrong? What do you think?