Maybe I just feel smothered?

I just need to get this out.

I like him, at least I think I do.
He treats me right, I can talk to him normally, I can be myself when I talk to him.
It bothers me when he gets romantic/cheesy and tells me he likes me a lot or that he misses me.
I've haven't even been that nice to him, I tell him he's stupid everytime he says he misses me and says how much he likes me.
I don't want to hear when someone likes me, just a few times is enough, not every ten seconds.
I don't want to hear how beautiful I am every ten seconds
I don't want to hear how "awesome" I am anymore.
I don't want to to hear every single day "you know I was thinking about you all day"

And it makes my heart ache to hear from his friend that he hasn't seen him this happy in a while.
Its flattering, but also ridiculous, Never say that, that just makes me feel like it depends on me for his happiness. I do not want to be the reason he's so happy.

I'm in California for three weeks and he says he's going nuts about how much he misses me. I'm totally myself when I talk to him, but I don't think he gets me. I keep warning him I might end up hurting because that's the kind of person I am...I'm too independent and free spirited sometimes.

I don't know what to do I tell him how I feel and he's so lovesick and blind he can't even understand me, he doesn't help me through it. I just want him to realize you can't like someone THAT much. I honestly don't think he likes me as much as he thinks he does, and I wouldn't care if that were the case.

I love to talk to him normally;when he gets lovey dovey I get annoyed though and I have to get off the phone because it scares me off.
I'm at the point where I really have to think about what I want for my life right now and I'm not even going to talk to him for the next couple days. I just don't know. One minute I want to be with him, the next I want to be single the rest of my life.

I think I should just let him go if I'm gonna be like this, no on deserves someone who's so unsure of everything
June 13th, 2009 at 09:17pm