I think I've reached my boiling point.

You know, my life hasn't been so bad until these last few weeks where I have wanted to continuously punch a wall or throw someone off a cliff, or just go to sleep and honestly never wake up.

and i'm not over reacting this time, it's true. I could honestly make a reality TV show out of my life, and I'd probably get pretty good ratings for it.

Like my family has always had the "chosen one", and I know what you're thinking, but it's true. My sister has ALWAYS been the one that gets what she wants, the one that has everyone sticking up for her, no matter what.

And because now I'm the youngest, I'm feeling it more than anyone else, my mum does anything for her, my mum doesn't listen of how alone I feel everytime my mum mentions Emma in one sentence. The way she goes on about her like "oh shes my rock, i wouldnt be anything without her" to other people and im just stood there, looking like the complete failed daughter that did nothing.

And I've just reached boiling point right now. It's not out of jealousy, because I really am not jealous of my sister.

I just feel lonely all the time. Like I want to go up town with my mum, or if I tell her something, Emma has to be involved somehow. It's annoying.. I just want a little bit of time with MY mum, and not have my sister breathing down my neck all the time.

She also uses my mum and dad alot, and you have no idea how much that winds me up. Like she gives my dad false hope, told him she could fix a bumper on her car, oh but look- she already told some other douchebag he could do it for £60 when she had ALREADY TOLD MY DAD HE COULD DO IT.

Every time we always get money as well, she's always up, asking for my mum to lend her money-oh and look, she always gets what she wants. ALWAYS.

Now I'm not the sort of person to just watch and let it happen, and I've told my mum how I felt.. TWICE, and she still doesn't listen to me, she keeps putting my sister before me, and you know what - its like 10000x worse now she has a baby.

I sound spoilt but i really dont give two shits.

Me and my mum usually get along, but she does things like this and it just.. it really makes me distrust her on a level I can't even comprehend. They all treat me like a little kid when I act probably more mature than everyone else does.

Oh yeah and I just learnt that my sister is involved in a physically abusive relationship with her boyfriend. Now it may sound harsh, but after what shes put this family through with him, threatening constant times down the phone hes going to kill my brother infront of his kids and how he'll snap my dads legs off - I really dont feel sorry for her.

I mean come on, she knew what she was getting involved with. My whole entire family thinks hes a waste, no one ever believed me when I said he would change, and this just about proves it. I'm sick of getting shot down, ignored and treated like crap.

The only person I feel sorry for is my newborn nephew, having to listen to them two argue. I thought my sister was better than that, and you know what? Even now my mum sticks up for my sister over me.

I'm sick of being second best, I'm sick of having to repeat myself and putting myself through mentally exhausting things when I don't think I deserve to be treated by my mum like this.