I am the heart with no name.

So, this is my first time ever really writing in any kind of journal. It's a very strange experience. I'm not really sure what I should write about.

I feel like I should write something meaningful, or something people would care to read. But that doesn't really make sense, seeing as it's my journal, and is not meant to impress anyone. I do that a lot, I try to impress people, it usually doesn't work out.

I guess I'm just kind of rambling. Afterall, it's a Wednesday afternoon, and I'm stuck at home doing nothing. I should have gone with my mom to the pool. But then again, as always, I stay at home waiting for my boyfriend to make time to come over. It's extremely frustrating, as I usually do this everyday, waiting for him, ya know? But I can't complain, I do love him, even if he's a complete tool sometimes. And when you love someone, you'll do anything for them.

So I wait. All the time. Everyday.

I don't want to sound like a whiney seventeen year old girl, complaining about how annoying her boyfriend is, but she LOVES him so much. So I won't. All I'm saying, it's annyoing. I wish he was a little more considerate, but hey, I deal.

Im dreading the moment my sister comes home. She's been 'missing' for a week. According her, she relasped and tried to hurt herself. I don't believe. She does this all the time, and I don't want to be part of her reunion. I don't want to hear it anymore. She does this all the time, and quite frankly, it's more bothersome than anything. I feel bad for her, yes. But not enough to cry, and welcome her home with open arms. She makes her own decicisions, and I don't agree with them. I mean, she's thirty three, and still lives at home. She just got fired from her job for not being there for a fucking week. She has three children, all with different fathers, and none of which, she actually cares for herself. I'm just sick of her.

I hope my mom doesn't let her stay here anymore. She needs to grow the fuck up, and man up. I can understand how my mom feels though. If something happened, she would feel so guilty, and her grandchildren would blame her for it. But at the same time, my sister won't learn anything if my mom keeps letting come home. I'm just very conflicted on the issue, just like everyone else.

I guess that's it. I don't know how to end this, or even if I should. I don't even know if what I wrote was good enough.