Once again, it's almost Halloween. The most wonderful time of the year. Seriously, on what other occasions can you dress up, run around at night from door to door and extort strangers for candy? Best holiday ever.
Yesterday while I was out running errands with the mother, we were discussing rad costume ideas. She and I are both pretty strong on our Pro Homemade Costume stance. I don't think I've ever had a store bought costume before.
I was feeling pretty stuck; my friends and I were planning to go as "Mulan" this year, but since we lost our Mushu, we've been setting up our backup costumes. I was juggling these ideas around: Jessica Rabbit, because who hasn't wanted to look like that, Major Kusanagi from Ghost in the Shell because I'm a geek, and Poison Ivy because I'm a really big geek.
And then, I had a revelation.
As those of you who follow me on Twitter know, I just returned from a three-week stint in Great Britain, mainly in Scotland. And on one day whilst in Glasgow, a very pleasant day - the Sun was shining and warm, so I was wearing my sunglasses - I was just walking around, exploring the Metropolitan area when some guy walking in the opposite direction looks at me, and says, much too loudly for my liking, "LADY GAGA OMG!!"
No, seriously. That really happened.
So, while looking at patterns in the fabric store, I decided to use that unfortunate ( ... ?) incident for the powers of good. And now, I am going as Lady GA-FREAKIN-GA for Halloween. Complete with the rock-candy-pleasuring-device disco stick thingy she carries around, except I'll be shouting, "With my Millenuim Rod, I can make people BREAK DANCE!" Only fans of Yu Gi Oh Abridged will get that reference, but I know my audience.
I was then discussing Halloween with Zia, and he mentioned that he was probably going to go as Michael Jackson. He could probably pull it off. He asked me what I was going, I said Lady Gaga, included my Break Dancing Rod bit, 'cause he gets it, and he replies, "I like it. Although I don't really know who Lady Gaga is."
I actually paused, and sat back, trying to think of, how to explain Lady Gaga. I replied, "she's the blond with the giant sunglasses who doesn't wear pants. You know, the crazy bitch. And not crazy as in, 'hey that chicks crazy!' No Zia, she's legitimately insane." Which is kind of why I like her. She's like my guilty pleasure.
My friend Jacques also asked me for Halloween suggestions. I told him he should go as John Freeman, who was Gordon Freeman's brother. I am seriously hoping that he does this. I would award him all the internets imaginable.
I'm also going to try and convince Andrew to go as John Freeman. It would be mildly humorous, because he works for EA [Sports]. I know EA gets a lot of hate because they're TEH EVIL EMPIRE !!!1!!1one and they buy out a lot of smaller video game companies, but I can't bring myself to hate them entirely because they did bring us Rock Band, and Andrew is like my walking Deus Ex Machina and I don't wanna be a playa'haytah. I actually found myself defending EA a few nights ago on the stance that, "my friend works for that company so .... yeah."
I sure owned that debate. Truly, I am a master debater. He he he.
I was relating that incident to Andrew last night. He seemed genuinely touched that I stood up for The Man, for once, for him. "Oh, it was nothing Andrew. Some people just need to stop sippin' on the Haterade when they ain't got Pimp Juice."
" .... You are a poet, Linden."
"Yeah, Thoreau's got nothing on me."
He was also extremely interested in my Skinny Dipping in Loch Ness story. But, that's for another day. Or probably until I finally get to editing the photos.
- Linden
PS: I really want to read some new stories. If any of your guys know of anything good, or want me to read some of your stuff, then leave me a comment. I would say, "hollah at yo gurl," but I am also very aware that I'm white, and so there's only so much phonics that I can pull off in one night. Hey, that kind of rhymed. I really am a poet. =)
"What is a Disco Stick? I want to know!" "I hope you find out; it wouldn't be right if it was a reference to male genitalia."
September 30th, 2009 at 09:24am