9.30.09

Today I sat in the back of the bus just incase something were to happen in the front. I liked it better in the back there was a bigger window and I like looking at things. People constantly ask me why I don't talk i simply respond with a shrug. Im much more of an observer than a talker. The girl i've been eyeing to talk to showed some interest in this guy today oh well i've been giving up on that awhile back. I like to think i'm worthless / life is worthless. I praise god, go to school, come home, praise god. We are human beings why can't we make choices like civilized people instead of what the government calls normal. I hate it when people say im below standard or above. It's like saying in a pack of wild animals "Go die your too weak" or if your above " come join the group" in being which we're all like clones. I don't want to even think of a girl anymore just myself. No one will ever like me for me and i'm fine like that. Friends say "you'll find someone" or some friends that are girls will say " your hot" if i really am then why am i never happy. Why am I abandoned dog on the street. I like to think i make an impression on people. I don't tell anyone but secretly i haven't forgotten people that have helped me in kindagarten. people say wow you remember that i obviously tell them yes. Hopefully one day soon I'll be of some use. With a Tie, a Suit, Sitting at a desk doing nothing but investing my time in a thing called life but hopefully it won't crash