I feel terrible!!!

I just asked y mom if I could go live with my dad in Arizona for a year and she got really upset and I mean reallly really upset. First she wasn't crying but then the more we started talking the more upset she got and we BOTH ended up crying:( I feel like the biggest JERK ever!!!!! I mean how could I make my mom cry like that. She basically thought I was saying she was a bad mom, WHITCH SHE'S NOT!!!!!! but she thought I was saying that. Then she was like " what can I do around here to make things better"? and that nearly broke my heart and that's when I started getting teary eyed..........UGH!!! why does it have to be so hard?!?! I just want to go for a year it's not that big of a deal. What am I going to do?