Sanity.

So, as my sanity begins to slowly slip away I feel myself constantly feeling as though life is extremely short. I know it's short, but.. shorter than it should feel.

I find myself thinking 24/7 about what death is like, and how to embrace it. Though, fearing death is not something that I enjoy doing, it's a feeling that gets brought on by the weirdest of things. I had a dream the other night of the world ending, having to say goodbye to people, standing on a hill as an asteroid came into contact with the earth, and feeling fear for the first time in my life. After I woke up, this fear didn't go away. It still lingers now and again whenever I see something that reminds me of this.

Is it normal to have such realistic dreams that it is near impossible to distinguish them from reality? Is it healthy for feelings to be brought back from the dreams? Sometimes the dreams are amazing, well detailed journeys beyond what I normally dream of. Other times they're different.. unexplainable horrors that I've flushed from my mind all together.

I feel as though I'm more intelligent than some of my peers. I may not be as smart in mathematics, or science, but I find I have a better overall outlook on life. I feel as though I'm smarter when it comes to the more essential things, or controversial things in life. I've never had somebody else whom I could share my thoughts with because most of them tend to joke, tease and otherwise push away my thoughts and questions. Talking to people older than myself is such a help. I love talking to people who are wise, understand lifes troubles and hardships, and can give a reasonable insight into what it's like in your later years.

Is this normal? I've yet to find out.