Alone?

The feeling just capsizes my brain telling me to say 'No' at all costs, but my idiotic body just goes for it. Everything disagrees, but here I am standing and thinking about them.. It's like hell, no worse! You realize the minute your alarm clock goes off. The voices in you head are never going away, unless you visit some 'loony' hospital to get some meds to make it go away. Sometimes they tell you things that are too cruel and unbearable . The world just starts to spin faster than expected, and time plays the biggest role. You know the range from where your born to when you die. The life expectancy makes people nervous, but not knowing exactly when or where you die just gives them that little bit of hope of an afterlife.

The deformed faces I'm seeing now have NOTHING to do with drugs, they have to do with my fucked up mind. It sounds like another crazy going down the path of some weird, creepy, and no way out. My mind is starting to scare me, its like I'm a dog stuck in a cage, yearning to get out; or someone stuck in a bad acid trip (you know you'd want to get the hell out of there).Everyone mentions how crazy is only good for art, movies, and music; damn are they right. If you were crazy ass person I would want to get the hell out of there. Taking pills all day, being 'observed' and oh for fucks being a lab rat. Then they realize theres no cure for crazy, so they get you in a room, stick you on some stuffy seat and have a shrink stare at you for an hour. Its like a demented human circus and I'm the bearded lady, get me the hell out of here.

The tent is too bright to see anything and it makes you go insane. The circus tent is like the ones in the storybooks, tall, bright, and happy; only when you go inside the minute take a glance and look around the room your shocked. The people you see; aren't the people you know. The backstabbers. When you actually loved someone and they do something idiotic to lose you.

Then again who's the crazy one actually noticing that when you notice that YOU ARE alone and always will be.

Just. That. Fact. Scares. The. Living. Shit. Out. Of. Me.