Okay, so I've talked about this guy before... and I like him even more. I'm not even sure if he likes me... but it seems like he's looking at me sometimes, and standing where I'm standing, and just... a lot of coincidences. Like, on Friday, he sorta lifted up his shirt to clean his iPod and he sorta smiled...glancing toward me... I could totally see he stomach and boxers so I looked away not wanting to seem like... weird. You know? He was in a conversation so maybe he wasn't smiling at me... more like... smiling at something funny.
I haven't even had a real conversation with him... that's just Fail. I'm more of a 'admire from afar' person, you know? If I knew for sure that he liked me, I'd ask him out... but the thing is: I don't know. I hate that, how I don't know. It's the worst part.
I just wish I could know if someone liked me. Just to know. My life would be so easy it seems like. Sometimes, I feel ugly, like a lot of people do. But it's just that my friends either have boyfriends, or they know who likes them, and they like them back and then there's me. I don't know a single person who likes me. Nobody, and I don't even see guys looking at me. Maybe it's just that I don't look, but I just don't see anybody. People say I'm pretty, and beautiful, but I've never really felt it. They don't even say it that much... but... idk...
My mom talks about how she liked a lot of guys in high school, and years later found out that they liked her too. I don't want that to happen, but I also don't want to be that girl that asked that guy out and got rejected. You know? So this is pretty much a dilemma. An ongoing one.
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