In your darkest hours.

Do you ever let people see you in your darkest hours? You know that time when you feel completely broken and helpless. I was just wondering because I know I don't. I only let myself break down at night when I'm alone

I you don't let people see you, then why? I feel like it's showing your weakness, it feels like your admitting defeat and letting people see that the world is getting the best of you. I know I rarely cry in front of anyone, it hurts more to shed a tear than to hold it in. I never cry from physical pain even when I've broken bones. Crying in front of people just sucks.

Have you ever thought about suicide? I know I have. Especially in sixth and seventh grade. I attempted it a couple of times, but backed out at the last second because it seemed so weak you know? It feels like you would just be forgotten or remembered as that coward.

Have you ever been depressed, how did you deal? Yes I have. I went through a bad depression, though I hid it from my family and friends. I steal struggle with it a little bit when old problems come up. I dealt with it by writing, I'm actually thankful for my depression because it showed me how much I loved writing and that I'm actually okay at it.

I'm not really sure what the point of this journal was even. I had a bit of a flashback to when I was really depressed for no reason for a moment and I seriously considered suicide for absolutely no reason. Sometimes I scare myself. It's funny when you realize just how much you may see people. Like you think you know someone, but then you remember all the things that you hide and you wonder what everyone else is hiding. What do they do late at night?