The Ex-Factor.

These days, I often find myself wondering if I am actually over any of my past boyfriends. You see, I've been single for a while now (approx. 2 months), and so haven't had much in my life to take my mind off of past romances. Unfortunately, I seem to be one of those people who thrive off of being in a relationship. Having a boyfriend always motivates me to go to the gym, read the advice pages in girlie magazines, and even shave my legs more often. When I am single, I just don't seem to care about that stuff as much, I have no-one in particular to look good for, no - one to think about whilst I am doing all of these very painful things. I feel sort of lost, even with all off my fabulous friends.

I know exactly what you're going to say too; you shouldn't need a guy to validate your existence, you should feel confident enough to be your own person...boy's aren't that important? And I know, I know that I should be like that. Believe me, I am a self-confident, self-assured, assertive woman. However, when it comes to the opposite, everything about me seems to crumble into a big, crumbly, mess.

I've never really had a particularly good relationship. I always seem to put more into them then I get out. Sometimes I feel as though I might actually like having problematic relationships; I get to sort out a problem, I feel as though I can somehow change the guy and how he feels. Plus, I always choose the difficult, bad boy types. And even though none of these relationships has ever really worked out for me, they have all been very special in their own ways. I know it sounds corny, but each of those boys in my past has a little piece of my heart and soul, and I think it will forever be theirs.

I honestly don't think I'll ever forget any of my serious relationships, no matter how many I have. I'm sure I'll think of all of them from time to time, and whether that is healthy or not, I am not sure.

So my questions to you are how often do you think about your ex's? Are you still friends with them? Do you still care for them? It would really interest me to see every-body's answers. Thanks you for reading this rather pointless journal :)