still take the pills and yes im addictied to them

well im stil ltryingto stop my self from taking the pain killers but i just cant id ont know why its like something is pulling me farther and farther in. the question is:: do i really want to stop or do i just feel like my life should come to a end well i feel like life in general should come to a end because i dont see the point of life so whats the point of living one that does not make scence?? i dont know i think i want to stop takeing the pain killers but i just donr know how im goingto be able to. HELP!!!! anyone got any ideas?? open for anything