The Peace That Tempest Brings

So I've been through a lot lately. My life has been turned completely upside down and inside out. I used to have my own amazing room and stuff with a heavenly bed and I lived with my family and i had a silver beamer and a job, but now... I'm sleeping on my friend's bedroom floor on a mat with some blankets, I'm living out of a suitcase and everything i had before? It's gone.
because I'm so messed up in the head and such an awful child and a derelict, i got sent to my biological dad in Arizona, who i love, but he's living with his parents and has no job. i ended up staying there not only for spring break, but also for the week after that because my parents wouldn't let me come back to the bay area to go to school while i stayed at a friends house.
i then talked to my mom for two hours on the phone and it was a good conversation- we cleared a lot of things up and we were on the same page then. However my decision to stay with my friend when i came back on my eighteenth birthday got misinterpreted so my parents stripped down my room and boxed up everything- apparently i was not coming back.
i went to see my parents the day after my birthday and it seemed pleasent. i got eighteen extra long stem roses, a laptop and a couple other things and my sisters had made me a cake. i went into my room and that was it... Just gone. All my books on the two bookshelves that i built were gone along with the glass paper weights, the walls were bare except for the big mirror, even the pillowcases were gone. I kept face during the whole thing but during the day when I'm at school, I'm a mess.
This loss, is agonizing. I lost everything. I lost my family, i lost everything i had, i have nothing and i don't know where I'm going to go. No money means no school, no car no home. No school means no life. I have no job, so therefore i have nothing, and finding a job now, is a complete joke.
I'm in so much pain. It hurts me every second of every minute of every day. That place in my mind, of my life before, no longer exists.
i will never sleep in that bed, look at those books, and live in that room ever again. I will never live in that house again. I will never have the same relationship with my parents again