You are just a mark, on the map of my past.

I've never seen a smile that can light the room like yours. It's simply radiant, I feel more with everyday that goes by. I watch the clock to make my timing just right. Would it be okay, would it be okay if I took your breath away.

That used to be our song and I've avoided it for the last two months at any cost but it came on just now as I was working on my notes. Thinking I'm past it all, I looked at my iTunes and thought, "I'm past it all. Yeah. I'm past it all, and I like this song." A verse into this song and I couldn't listen to it anymore as my eyes nearly filled with tears.

I know that I had sworn I'd never trust anyone again but I didn't have to. You had me at hello. You gave me butterflies at the mailbox.

It's such a beautiful song, with words crafted just right to make sense to us and maybe a million other couples. But to me, knowing that it made sense to you the way it made sense to me was more than enough. That's why it was our song. It meant something to us, we knew the lyrics weren't superficial like many other generic love songs that singers write just to get Billboard hits.This song brought me back to you when we were apart. This band held meaning to us because another one of their songs defined the helpless difficulties we encountered. There is so much semantic value. I can't listen to this song without thinking about what it/ we meant to you. When I listen to this song, I think that we meant the world to you just like you said it did. And I am sure it did, but when this song plays, I also think about how you just left without a trace, and how is it possible to do such a thing when something means the world to you.

Up until this morning, I thought I was over this whole thing because I just graduated and when I was reflecting on it, I thought it'd be the kind of thing I'd want to share with you. But it wasn't. I had the most amazing two days and I don't want to share them with you. I don't even want to talk to you. But I just listened to this song and wrote this all out and tears rolled down my cheeks and I don't know why. I think it's just the hurt and the insensitivity of your actions as opposed to actually missing you.