Victim of Rape

It's not the first time its happened. He's done this before, when i was 10. Thats when it all started. I had no idea what was going on, i had no clue he was snatching my innocence clean from my hands. And he just laughed and slapped me again, he told me to never mention this or i'd wish i'd never been born, but the funny thing is i wish that now, and i've wished it for 5years now. i never saw him again after that day, but the nightmares kept his presence and image close to me.

Now that i've grown and changed and just starting to feel comfortable with who i am, his presence comes to me again. But not in the form if a nightmare, in real life. We were just sitting there, my friends and I. They were all lost in the conversation. But i wasnt. Something caught my attention, it was the same sickening feeling that i had felt on that day, 5 years ago.

i looked up only to see him walk past, his eyes watching me like the bird of prey he is. He dissapears for a few seconds only to return...He just stood there, his eyes peircing through the 'barrier' i had put up to protect myself from,well, everything. And just as i couldn't gasp for air anymore, he winked. And the world stood still. I felt his icey-ness rape my soul once again.

This was when paranoia set in and i had to work that night. Things were going great though, at work i mean. i was having fun being an idiot with my work mates....And then with only 20mins till my shift was over, he appears and hesitantly stood there, deciding whether or not to come through my checkout. Our eyes locked and he cuts me up yet again. Seeing my fear and shame must have deen satisfying enough because he decided to go through the express lane...and he watched me the whole time as he made his way out of the mall....and i havent seen him since...but im waiting and becauseim so insecure and vulneral at the moment...-bursts into tears- he'll have me again!