Loneliness

I don't really know what it is that is making me so sad.

I've been feeling quite depressed since yesterday, but who knows why? Not even me.

The weather isn't very supportive today. A white, bleak sky doesn't exactly lighten the mood. The trees would look so much prettier with the sunlight in them, like usual. The squirrels obviously don't see the circulating sadness-- they just keep chasing each other like their playful selves. Such oblivious animals, if I do say so myself.

I feel lonely, like I need someone in particular, but yet I want to be alone. Is this just part of my loneliness? Do I simply need to go and see someone to overcome this feeling of introversion? My mind feels all jammed. Yes, it was the history and math work I had to make up. That jammed my brain like a printer gets jammed if you stuff too much paper in at one time.

How many squirrels are there now?? 1...2...3...4...5...6... about eight or nine, probably even ten. Not that you can count effectively when they're jumping around and chasing each other in their oblivious glee.

How is it that my dad, who has been building his immune system for forty-six years, catches my sister's cold, while I'm only fifteen and I spend every night in the same room as her with the door closed while she sleeps and exhales for eight hours and I have no symptoms of it at all? It's strange that I haven't gotten the bug even though she's practically circulating her germy air around the room for at least seven hours.

Biology is weird.

I should listen to my friend's concerto. He plays violin like a madman. Maybe if the sky hears it, it'll put the sun out because it's great to listen to when it's sunny. Or maybe just to spite me it won't. I prefer the first option. Let's try it.

Bummer. The sky is really hating on me today. And I checked the weather site and it said it would be cloudy the entire day. Ugh...

Wait, all the squirrels are gone. Weird...

I need to talk to one of my friends before I go insane. I can feel the craziness setting in. The maniacal laughter is about to start. Well okay, it won't go that far. But I think I need to go see civilization before my brain rots from my math and history work. Heck with the weather and the stupid colds. I'll survive.

I'll survive the loneliness.

And I'll keep listening to that concerto.