Sometime I Wonder What it Would be Like to be Normal

Gee, I just wrote an entire journal entry that got deleted because my internet connection is mentally retarded. AT&T blows.

So anyways, I really just need to let off a bit of steam, metaphorically speaking, and ramble on for a bit. I have no one else that will listen, even if you don’t. This is what Mibba is for, right? At least the journal section, anyways. I really just want to ramble on for a bit and get some feedback for once in my life. I swear it’s like it doesn’t matter if they care what I say. Yet, it's what I am most sensitive about. I hate being ignored more than near anything.

.... Moving on.

So yesterday, or Wednesday, saying that it will be around 2:30 a.m. when this gets posted. (Insomnia) was a week until my birthday, therefore making it Shaun's birthday. Allison and I were going to celebrate by getting cupcakes and taking them to the local park. Since my mother (ugh) would disapprove of buying cupcakes for the birthday of a guy, I had to lie and say that it was for a pre-birthday party with Allie, so I went to the cupcake shop to order some cupcakes and they said that we had to buy two-dozen to make an order. Two-dozen red velvet with cream cheese frosting cupcakes. So we order the cupcakes, and I depart for Allison’s house with a box full of bright red cupcakes in-hand. After retrieving actual food from Chik-Fil-A, we went to the park. Back to the subject, I went into the forest and now I am 99% sure I have poison ivy, and am allergic to it. Just another object added to my infinite things I am allergic to.

Onto another subject, I have really bad friends. I really must repel people, right? I have like 3 good friends, and none of them give a crap about my life. I spend hours walking around my neighborhood every day just to listen to one of them ramble about their life, but the second I mention my life, she couldn't care less. With my other friends, we barely ever talk about our real lives in the first place. They just aren't the right people to cry upon their shoulders. This, sadly, is all I want. I've spent all my life behind the veil of happy and bubbly, pushing my sadness and troubles into the corner, only to pile up until its unbearable. Sometimes, I just want to be able to cry, and be hugged and told "it's going to be alright." If only that could happen, it would all be better, but no, I have to be the one that comforts all of my broken hearted friends, and make them feel better. I envy them, and how easily they can cry and let it all out. Just to let a tear slip from my eye is all I want sometimes, but all those years of having to be strong has made me stronger than I ever wanted to be.

I think I should stop now. I'll most likely put up another one soon... Thank you Mibba people for always commenting on everything, you make my life so much better its ridiculous.

So I've seen alot of people putting pictures up of themselves, and I was wondering if I should. I dont have very many and I'm not much to look at, but I still can.
Comment: Should I put pictures up?