How is it possible that I can love my family so much, and yet they still irritate me to no end? Does anyone else ask themselves that after an argument with their folks or after some other sort of fall-in? Yeah, as you can tell from the title, I had recently got into a pretty bad tiff with my mother. Believe it or not, this is actually a pretty common argument we find ourselves in. Well, since I feel like venting out some frustration, here goes:
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Okay, now, I had an idea that I would get a Twitter account. Now, I haven't done it yet. Now, my idea was that I would Twitter as if I was an adventurer traveling the world over slaying monsters. Now, this isn't anything new, I've seen hundreds of people use Twitter to Tweet themselves as fictional characters.
Now, my mom said she found that to be very weird, okay, fair enough. I explained to her that it is all in good fun, and good fun only, and that hundreds of people do it. She then went off saying that it was still weird, and finds it strange that I obsess over "fantasy-stuff" as she calls it. She then keeps going on about how she liked “fantasy-stuff” as a teenager too, and that hopefully I’ll grow out of it, like it’s some phase or something. I told her that I just LOVE the genre, and that's what I write, of course I'm going to be passionate over it. I mean, this is coming from a guy who would flip to the mythology section of his literature book while everyone else in class is reading the Great Gatsb. I also informed her that I like to roleplay, so I figured this might be a fun opportunity to do so, because I haven’t done so in YEARS since my Warcraft days.
She then kept going on and on that it's weird and maybe I should start growing up(I HATE it when people tell me that, by the way), and start getting interested in what other 18 year olds are interested in. At this point, I was thinking “like what?”. Sports? I’m not interested in sports, and quite frankly, I find them boring to watch. Girls? I already LOVE women. Sex? Yes, I enjoy sex, even though I’m still a virgin. Drugs and Alchohol? Eh, no thanks. Basically, she was TRYING to convince me to conform to what society deems as “normal” again. Now, I do understand that conforming isn’t necessarily bad, and in fact, it’s a good idea to conform a LITTLE. Like, for instance, I wouldn’t admit that I love to roleplay to someone I just met right off the bat to some stranger, or what have you. And then she explained that I should heavily conform to others because she said that people in general are judgmental, and will judge me based on my hobbies and interests. My response was, "Well screw them, who cares what the hell they think then? If they can’t accept me for who I am, then they’re not worth talking to."
She THEN said that if I got a real job, and if my boss sees my Twitter page, he might fire me or something. "Well, that's stupid! Who fires employees because of their interests? I'm just roleplaying, it's not like I'm writing a log of all the people I murdered." I said. “And, yet again, you ACT like ALL l I EVER talk about is how much I love fantasy or whatever when I’m around people.”
She then said that life isn't fair, and that unlike me, who's open-minded and very accepting of others, people WILL judge me for what I do, and if I ever hope to get a girlfriend or more friends, I should conform to their interests and grow up(there it is again!) She also said that I should start taking life more seriously, now that I’m 18 and going to college.
"Well, if my future girlfriend can't accept my interests and hobbies, and if she can't accept that I'm a total nerd at heart, then she should go jump off a bridge! good riddens'! And I have plenty of friends as is. I got two who accept my interests and love and respect me for who I am."
She then compared me to a Trekkie, and said that every one who dresses up for those Star Trek conventions are fat, nerdy guys who live in their mom's basements and don't have a wife and kids. Bullshit. This where I started to get mad.
"Mom, not EVERYONE who does that are fat, nerdy guys who live in their mom's basements. And who says you need to settle down and have kids to be happy? Since when does having a family=happiness and success? And SOME of them probably DO have and wife and kids, and some of them probably go to cons together. In fact, I bet there are female Star Trek fans who go to cons too. And what's wrong with what they're doing? It's harmless, and it's all in good fun, and they simply want to express their love for the series."
She then fell back on the whole, "people think it's weird" argument. I then said, "They obviously don't care! If they're having fun, who cares what other people think!"
Blah, blah, blah, she then told me to grow-up(ugh!!), face reality, abandon my love for fantasy, and she then said, "It's like those 40 year olds who still play video games even when they have a family to take care of and let their kids play with them."
As a gamer, that hurt. Now, I never swear around my folks, but I was really close at this point.
"Well, isn't that a good thing!? If a family plays video games together, that means they all have a common interest that brings them together, and that=a happy family!! And I know you have to make sacrifices in marriage, but I'm not giving up my most precious interests and hobbies that make up who I am."
blah,blah,blah, we both argued some more, I got pissed, I didn't want to hear anymore, I left, and I shut the door to my room.
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Now, I'm not trying to paint my mom as a witch. Trust me, I LOVE her, and I wouldn't have any other mom. It's just...Whenever I bring up the subject of roleplaying, or why I love fantasy so much, or conformity, this happens. It's annoying. This argument almost always occurs whenever I question why society works the way it does as well. Who knows? Maybe it’s that “generation gap” I keep hearing about.
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