Death?

Everytime I watch the music video for "Dear God" I always cry because I see Jimmy in it alive and doing what he loves. Everytime I read something about him being dead I tear up. I don't understand how I can have so much compassion for a man I never met. Maybe it's because everything anyone says about him is that he's so funloving and I wonder why someone like that has to die at such a young age. Maybe it's because he was engaged and never got to get married to the woman he loves. Hell, maybe its because I love his band so much and I feel for them. It's so odd to me because when my great grandmother died, I cried but once and then I accepted it. But this man I've never met, I cry over everytime I think about his death. Thats why in my story "I Must be Dreaming" I make his personality shine through in the afterlife. That even though he's gone he's still the fun loving person everyone loved.

Then I start thinking about death and religion. What if there is no God? Do we just go into a black abyss never to see or hear or feel again? And if there is such a thing as God why does he take important people out of our lives? I was raised in a semi-religeious family. We beleive in God but we dont go to church. My brother and I where also free to have our own beliefs on religion. The concept of death scares most people because of the fear of the unknown. People who have died obviously can't come back to talk about it over a cup of tea and truffles. Those that are medically dead for a minute or something, who do come back and talk about it, if thiers any talk about a white light or feeling unconditional love, scientists explain it all away. They say it's the brains way of accepting death. It's like they dont want us to have any hope or comfort when we go.

It honestly makes me wonder what they told their loved ones when they where on their death bed. I mean he usual consolation is that you'll go to heaven and all that. But what do they say? You'll be dead. Gone. I won't ever se you again because it's impossible, by the way happy dieing!

Huh I honestly have no clue how talking about Jimmy brought me on this rant on scientists. Anyways.

I wonder if you beleive in God if dieing isn't as scary versus someone who doesn't. I mean if I beleived there was nothing after death, I'd be scared too. Dieing must be such an odd thing. I mean one second you can hear and feel and see and the next...nothing.

It makes me wonder what goes through peoples' heads when they commit suicide. I mean if you beleive in god and the ten commandmentsand seven deadly sins you obviously know killing yourself is a straight shot to Hell. But if you don't beleive in God, would you rather find comfort in the blackness that your sure will insue after your last feeble breath? When you feel your hearts last weak attempt to pump blood into your system what goes through your head? Are you at peace or are you wishing you had never commit suicide? That would be terrifying to die with regrets. I couldn't imagine my last regret being that I wished I hadn't killed myself.

It seems the only mysteries lef to humanity now days are the brain and death.

If you read through all of this, I apologize for it being so morbid and semi depressing but it was just some things on my mind. Feel free to share your thoughts.