What's your passion?

Boyfriend asked me this question a bit ago, and I was thinking about the answer when I realized, I don't think I have a passion. And then I thought about how when people ask me what I want to do for a living, when I'm out of high school, and I always answer, "Oh, I don't know yet."

What if I never find out? What if I just end up doing some part time job that was open because I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT I WANTED TO DO?

I COULD say my passion is music and my violin, and sure, I listen to A LOT of different music, but I suck at the violin, and I dread practicing. I could never survive doing something in the music department.

So then I though, maybe my passion is theatre, and as much as I love it, is it my PASSION? Is acting what I really want to do? Who even REALLY makes it as an actor, anyway?

Maybe it's art. I draw and in fact, I used to want to be an illustrator or cartoonist or something, but do I now?

I then had the thought of teaching or children! Maybe my calling is with kids! (Then I remembered I very much dislike other people's children.) No, that's not it.

Then, after I thought of all this, I couldn't even talk to boyfriend anymore because I got this weird anxiety attack and started to cry because I got scared.

I think I'm TOO open minded. Like, in everything I do, I see the bad part of it, and it makes the love I have for it dim because it's clogged by all the negative things like the low chance, or the skill I have, and so on.

So, I'm wondering, does anyone else know what their passion is???