Changing

Yeah so I'm feeling like a different person. I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing. I'm a senior now, more mature I guess, but it makes me uneasy. I'm hearing about freshman getting into fights. Freshman! A friend of mine womped on a freshman. I wish I could have seen it. I never get the chance to do anything fun like that anymore. It sucks.

Yeah, I'm supposed to be all grown up and everything at my age. But it's scary how far I simmered down. An example would be when these two punks came up behind me and my little sister. All I did was turn and tell them to back off. A year ago, I would have told them to back off and then popped them in the face.

I guess it bothers me more because I really think about crap like "what if one of those kids had a knife?" or "what if those idiots really tried to like grab me or my sister?" I'm older than my sister so the natural instinct is to protect her. I feel like a wuss at how I handled that situation.

I don't know. It's just weird looking back and seeing all the chaos I'd jump into and what a real shit starter I was. I mean, even though I have become more mellow towards people (but I still hate them), a lot of them still think of me as a crazy cut throat girl.

So, yeah, it's crazy how much I've changed, almost unbelievable. I really used to be the kid who was socially awkward with a friend or two and had an extremely bad temper. Now, I'm still a socially awkward kid with one or two friends minus the extremely bad temper.

Growing up sucks big time reindeer.
<3Tezzy