Yes I realize that I just posted a journal. But I'm having a bad day. Sue me.
I'm really sad today Mibba. It's alarming. it's one of those "everything hit you at once" kind of things.
It scares me. I used to live every day feeling like this. I never realized how hard it was. It was just normal to me. But now, it just hurts. Like this gnawing hole in the pit of my stomach. Like someone is squeezing at my heart. I used to be so good at making it go away.
I think it has a lot to do with something that happened to me when I was young. I finally opened up about it. I told my boyfriend the way it made me feel. That's a lot harder than just telling what happens. Because those are facts, and I can detach myself from facts.
I'm also afraid of loosing him. Honestly, besides one other friend who I can't really talk to about emotional things, he's all I have. I love him to death but he can't stand to see me upset. I don't know. Sometimes I just wish there was someone else to talk to.
Well, thats it I guess.
Not registered?
Create an account