Random venting.

I can't place my finger on it.
There's some kind an uneasiness swelling in my chest; like a warning, almost. Maybe my heart will be torn apart once again? Maybe someone I care about is leaving me? Or is it all in my head, finally manifesting into something bigger due to a big change in my life and the way I think? I feel a sudden emptiness, the urge to just give up on everything. I want to simply fall to my knees and scream - though I can't express any emotion here.
I try to get my thoughts down on paper like normal, but no words find their way into my old poem journal, no ballad escapes from my lips when I get an impulsive hunger for music.
I'm lost. I'm alone. I'm confused.
Nothing new there,
But those feelings have been gone for a while.
Why must they come back now, more painful and nostalgic than ever before?
I can't think clearly, and it's been hurting my relationships with people: I keep saying things I don't mean, censoring myself and those around me from how I really feel, building walls between those who were close to me before and I.