Have you ever been in love, internet, world? I'm not sure if I am but, I don't want to say I am. You see, everything that I say I love you to or, everything that is good is always taken away from me.
This one Boy, I don't know. He is older than me. Five years. yes I know that is bad but if you look at me friends, they have dated even older guys! 29 year olds when there 13. He is only 18 and I am only 13.
Would you like me to tell you what I feel? I can't even tell myself how I feel. This boy(we can call him MS) is so sweet. He is kind and funny. Cute too. I always think of him. He never leaves me mind and I dream of him everynight. He may not look the same or sound the same but its him and I know it.
When I see him I get butterflies and my plams get sweaty. I get nervous and I am even more clumsy. Whenever he looks at me my stomach drops and I'm not sure what to say or do. I remember the first time I met him and if you want to hear the story just comment. He flirted and smiled. He hit on me(I look older than I am) and I blushed.
We talked and became friends. We talked at Karate, the place me met and if I would see him at his job(Mickyds). My friend would go there everyday to 'Just get a frappe' and give me updates because she could see how I felt but how I looked at him.
The summer came and like a typical teenager I was busy with friends and family, so I didn't get to go to karate that much. I remember when I was in Winn-Dixe and I saw him working there. I was with my mom.
"Mom, I think I just saw MS." She asked if I liked him and I always said no. I knew she knew though. He walked pasted not seeing us. "MS, MS, Oh MS!" He turns and so does my head. "Hi MS! ______ Say hi!" I look up at my mom still not looking at him. "Hello. Mother lets go!" We start to walk off and I turn and he is still staring.
I found him on Facebook and I requested him as a friend, asking if he remembered me. He didnt get on for a while and I got upset one day so I asked if he liked me and I told him I liked him. He got on a few weeks later adding me and sending me a message.
"Yes I remember you. I think your cute, I just never had the courage to tell you." He told me his scheulde if I wanted to talk in person. He got on one night and we talked. I asked if he liked me more than a friend he said he didnt have deep emotion for me and told me about his past. We talked for about an hour before we had to go. He still loves his ex and I still love him. I told me that he tried to like me. He flirted, hit on me, tried to think about me so he wouldn't feel so bad about his ex. He used me and I knew it but, as soon as he said that I forgave him and I still don't know why. I never forgive people who use others but, I make excuses for him all the time.
I told him I liked him to much and I couldn't talk to him anymore. He said I don't have to go and he still wants to talk to me but if its better this way, he let me go. I saw him that weekend and everywhere we went reminded me of him. I ethier saw him there, thats where he goes or he worked there.
I added him again saying I got over him. Soon I was in a depression because we never talked but I always saw him, even if he wasnt there. I was going to remove him from my friends but saw his brother in law got into a wreck that claimed his life and I couldn't do it.
I put 'If I were to die tomorrow what would you say to me today?' as my staus and he IMed me saying, 'If you were to die tomorrow i assure you, you would be safe.' Then he goes into we can't date and blah blah blah. I told him I know. He told me he would go to jail and I told him I got over him. He said I liked him because i messaged him i liked him it was in his history. I told him i didnt and that I was over him. He still didnt believe me. I got mad and told him if he didnt believe me then delete me and now I'm wishing i didnt say that because every time i get on facebook i check to see if he is still my friend or not.
So internet, I'm asking you your opinion on the whole subject. Do you think I love him? Should I get over him? Do you think the story is cute? Do you not?
P.S. I named this after romeo and juliet because it sounds simular to me. No one wants us together but, i secretly want to be his. I don't think he wants me to be his but latly he has been flirting again. We secretly meet and talk. So please, comment and tell me what you think.
~Juliet
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