How to Take Criticism

I’ve noticed that some persons throughout the years really can’t handle being criticised, and some naturally find it hard to deal with non constructive criticism. So I figured I should write this “guide” or “manual” to help out. (This is primarily aimed towards GSB poets posting in the Poetry section of the Message Board, but it can be applied to other situations as well.)

For you how know a little about Johnny Rotten you would probably know how he was almost afraid to show his lyrics to the band because he wanted everyone to love them right away and was scared that they wouldn’t like them or parts of them. I have sort of the same syndrome. When posting on GSB I’m deadly afraid to look when there’s a new comment since I’m so scared that by poem will get bashed. So at first I found it hard not to take the constructive criticism personally, either I had a hard time accepting that my poem really wasn’t all that great or I did accept it but I feel really hurt and worthless. It’s hard to get rid of that feeling even if I in the very beginning knew that you should never hate yourself or your poem/song because of somebody’s opinion on it. Even if they bash it.

Image
Johnny Rotten aka John Lydon

Personally I ask persons who criticise my poems to be more specific about what they dislike, why they dislike it and how they think it should be. I also ask them for tips. If they can’t give tips on how to make it better their criticism isn’t really valid since they don’t help you improve. That’s what constructive criticism is for.

Since there are rules now you accept that you possibly will get criticism. And that makes everything so much simpler. You simply can’t go berserk when someone criticizes your poetry. Before that happened a lot but now everyone simply has to deal and move on. Of course you shouldn’t accept that people lash out at you saying that you’re worthless and that your poem absolutely sucks (and not even tells you why). That’s not what accepting constructive criticism is all about. It’s about listening to people who try to help you and take what they say into consideration without getting angry at them for criticizing your work and not trying to “free” yourself from responsibility by making up excuses (such as; “It’s just venting anyway”, “I was tired, that’s why the spelling sucks” or “It make perfect sense to me so my poem is great, you just don’t understand” etc.). Because guess what? When posting you want an opinion. If it’s just venting and you aren’t going to care what people say, don’t post. There are spell checkers. And if a poem makes no sense to the readers something must obviously be wrong, especially when a lot of persons state the same thing.

“If you post it, it will get comments. If needs improvement you will get constructive criticism.
Now you know. So don’t post a poem if you think it sucks or if it’s just venting shit.
You can’t defend yourself by saying: “I just wrote it down, that’s why it sucks.”
(Or something like that.)
If you want to post something that you haven’t put an effort into that’s your problem.
There’s a “risk” it’ll get torn to shreds.
I’m only telling you this to be nice.”
– What’s in a name?

Don’t get angry. Even if you don’t agree you should never get angry at a person giving you constructive criticism. Ask question, ask for tips and explain your point of view. Don’t ignore a person giving you very extensive constructive criticism, that person is likely to be correct. Try not to be too stubborn. If someone tell you something and gives you tips on how to improve you should at least try it and see if it works and if it’s right for you. For example, I got told that I should use punctuation in a poem. I said that “The reason there isn’t punctuation is because the lines continue and I want that kind of structure so punctuation isn’t really an option here.” Punctuation is part of the writing rules (not talking board rules here but real life rules) and ignoring them like that isn’t the brightest idea. If the person had told me that there was another way that you can use in poetry that works as punctuation I would have changed it. So it’s always a good idea to give tips on how to do instead. :wink:. (And if you actually do make the effort to change I hope that you’ll get some credit for it and that the person criticizing you will tell if it’s better or not.)

At times you will get comments saying that your poem/song is great and for what reasons. If there then comes along one, or perhaps two, person(s) that tells you you’ve done it all wrong do you know how to react? Is your poem good or not? Well, if they simply bash you without stating what they didn’t like in specific and why, you’ll know that your work is good and can calmly answer them. If however the person states exactly what he/she thinks you’ve done wrong you can pay a little more attention. Try to ask the person why he/she didn’t like your poem/ song or parts of it and what he/she thinks could be done for improvements. If the person doesn’t answer, can’t answer or can’t leave satisfying answers you’ll know that you can trust the rest and that your poem is perfectly fine. If the person happens to give you constructive criticism telling you what he/she didn’t like in specific, why and how it could be improve you should probably listen. Because it’s likely that that person is an experienced writer and the others might just like to read a bit of poetry every once in a while.

“In what why did the second bolded line sound forced to you?
What about it was forced?”
– What’s in a name?

““Why is the wording awkward?
If you would rewrite that line you’re speaking of, what would it look like?”
– What’s in a name?

Sometimes people give criticism that’s only based on their own personal (subjective) opinion. Don’t feel bad or get upset/angry if you get such a comment. Most of they time they don’t know what they’re talking about and you don’t have to feel bad, or get angry because they are “stupid”. Just explain to them why you wrote your poem/song that way and it’s all good. Perhaps they’ll learn something? Just don’t make the mistake of always believing that you’re right :wink:.

When people correct your grammar or spelling, listen! More often that not they know what they’re talking about if they make the effort of correcting you. If you’re positive that you’re right ask a third part who knows!

Image
J.R.R Tolkien was a language expert.
You should at least know the basic.


One last thing, don’t be too submissive either! If you do exactly what everyone tells you you will loose your originality and your creativity. To listen to advices is wise and to change because you realize it’s the best thing for your writing is good, but to obey blindly is simply stupid!

Hope this can help.

(This is just “common sense” and it’s noting you could base an essay on. It’s simply what I’ve noticed and learned from my three years in the poetry forum. This isn't written to anyone in specific like; “you should read this because you just don’t get it”. It’s more general tips than anything else.)
February 21st, 2007 at 12:29pm