They Say That All Beauty Must Die. I Say it Just Moves On.

It's been a whole year without James Owen Sullivan. It hurts so much to think of it. For days I've been preparing myself, telling myself that he wouldn't want me sad, and that's very true. When i woke up this morning, I didn't cry. I went through a few hours and didn't shed a tear. When i got my balloon for the event I created on facebook, I attached the letter I wrote to him, ran out in the snow, rolled around a bit while laughing (because he would have loved that) and finally let the balloon go. I didn't want to cry, but I started to.
Jimmy, tonight I'm going to celebrate your life, not be sad.

I've heard that people have been disrespectful towards The Rev today. There were a few journals and comments I was told of, but I didn't go in search of them. I understand that we've all, as Avenged Sevenfold fans, dealt with drama. We got a lot of people dissing the band and its fans. I've witnessed it, my friends and family, the band members themselves...so what makes today any different for those who think it's kind to disrespect? It's not. To them, it's another day. To us, it's a year after the backbone of A7X broke. Yes, what they say can be hurtful and I've been in many fights just to have the band's back. The fights are pointless and most of the time, all the person wants is to see us angry. So let's not please them. Jimmy wouldn't want that. As M. Shadows once said:

"I think you gotta have balls to be an Avenged fan sometimes. A lot of our fans get hated on just as much as us. To me, Avenged fans aren’t just fans of a band, they are fans of everything that surrounds it, like a life style. We live it, you live it. You go to the shows and you can feel it. It’s a great experience and people that aren’t involved will never understand. So they can stand on the lines and talk, but we will continue to do just what makes us happy.”

I read in a journal today that the person respects Jimmy even though she doesn't know of him or the band. She just wanted to know why we respected The Rev; what he did that was so special. I think it's different for a lot of people. To me, Jimmy was an idol. He lived loud with no regrets. He dreamed of becoming something much bigger than himself and he achieved it. He kept his best friends close, protected them, and defended them when needed. He had a huge heart; he would do anything for anyone and he always saw the good in people. Jimmy was an inspiration for me; he showed me that whatever I wanted, whatever I dreamed, I could accomplish if I wanted it badly enough. I want to change the world. I don't know how exactly, but I want to leave a mark that said "I was here", just like Jimmy did.

I'm not going to cuss you out or disrespect you for disrespecting the band or its members, but I will ask that you try to understand what us fans are feeling. Sure, maybe you couldn't care less about Jimmy. Maybe to you he was just some "bad" drummer who died from a drug and alcohol overdose. Maybe you think he did it on purpose. Maybe you don't. Whatever your thoughts may be, please keep the rude comments to yourself.
Think of someone you admire, someone who meant more to you than others may believe. What if one day you wake up to hear this person died? Just, please, before you judge or comment, try placing yourself in our shoes.

On another note, I can't even imagine what his friends and family are going through. I haven't heard anything for Leana in a while, but I hope she's still smiling that bright smile of hers. She's stronger than I would be if I were in her position...

If you took time to read all this, I give you a huge hug! Jimmy, I know you're smiling down on us in heaven. Keep us safe. Tell the boys we love them. I love you, foREVer.