Ever been sad, and you're not quite sure why?

For the past couple days(months, really) I've been strangely sad. At first, I had no clue why. It was a weird sensation. I didn't want to really talk to people, but I did so no one would question me. I moped around the house. Not interacting with my mom or step dad. I just stayed in my room. I can't talk to my Mom because she never believes me when I tell her something is wrong with me. I'll tell her I have an extremely hard time sleeping and she thinks I just want to stay up, when in reality, I really want to sleep. I just can't.

She's also kept me away from my Dad. She thinks his living situation is unstable, when it's really not. So, I called him today and we talked for hours. Not really about anything important. Just normally daily activities. School, his work, etc. Then it hit me. I'm so sad because I haven't seen my Daddy since last June. I miss him so much. And the only way I can see him is if he drives up here, but he won't. He always makes promises and then rips my heart out. Just like my 11Th birthday. I had a party and he said he would come. And he didn't. Asked for directions and everything.

But, that's beside the point. I just really miss my Dad despite all the lies he's sad. I don't care because I know he loves me and he didn't mean to hurt me.
January 17th, 2011 at 08:20am