"Why should I stop cutting myself?"
"Why should I quit?"
"Why should I give up self-harm?"
"Why, why, why?"
When YOU self-harm, it effects everyone else around you. And if you don't have anyone around you, it effects the earth. When YOU self-harm, you're not solving your problems. You're making them worse. When YOU self-harm, you're not expressing your internal conflict and emotion. You're burying it even deeper.
When you self-harm, you may not be dealing with the underlying issues. Depression, stress, anger, etc. will continue to bury deeper and deeper when a person self-harms. It may cause temporary and instant gratification, but in the long run, you're piling more and more onto yourself and your emotional load (also called the pain-body.)
Self-harmers usually do it on their own, alone. This isolates you and in turn you may not get the support you may need to work it out. You may also have to lie. If you don't feel that people would understand you, you may have to lie and cover up your self-harm. A lot of young people find this secrecy very difficult to maintain and stressful to deal with. This is why a lot of the injuries that result from self-harm are not properly looked after by an adult or doctor. Cuts can become infected if not looked after. They can also cause permanent scars.
There is a risk that one day, without meaning to, you may go too far, and die.
Trust me when I say that the sooner you stop, the easier it will be to recover. Because you're going to have to recover one day. Self-abuse can't go on forever, no matter how much we believe that it can.
So let's stop right now.
Alderman suggests this useful checklist of things to ask yourself before you begin walking away from self-harm. It isn't necessary that you be able to answer all of the questions "yes," but the more of these things you can set up for yourself, the easier it will be to stop hurting yourself.
1. I have a solid emotional support system of friends, family, and/or professionals that I can use if I feel like hurting myself.
2. There are at least two people in my life that I can call if I want to hurt myself.
3. I feel at least somewhat comfortable talking about SIV with three different people.
4. I have a list of at least ten things I can do instead of hurting myself.
5. I have a place to go if I need to leave my house so as not to hurt myself.
6. I feel confident that I could get rid of all the things that I might be likely to use to hurt myself.
7. I have told at least two other people that I am going to stop hurting myself.
8. I am willing to feel uncomfortable, scared, and frustrated.
9. I feel confident that I can endure thinking about hurting myself without having to actually do so.
10. I want to stop hurting myself.
Don't obsess over your self-harm, don't obsess over your injuries or your scars. Don't talk about your self-harming, unless it is to benefit your well-being, not detract from it. Instead of continuously battling your issue with self-harm, accept it and rise above it. Realize that self-harm goes against nature. Animals do not purposefully hurt themselves. You don't need to self-harm. And if you do, don't obsess over it. Just move on and do whatever you can to stay above this addiction.
My other journal about self-harm: How to Stop Self-Harming
Other useful links about how to stop self-harm:
one | two | three | four | five | six | seven | eight | nine | ten
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