Adventures of Starnapping

Look at the stars they are so far away. Away in space, outerspace that is, and ya know I think I'mma get me one.

My journey for starnapping started about five years ago. I was in my psychology class and the professor asked if any one knew the exact definition of the word DUNG. I scratched my head and said " Well shit of course.", the professor look at me as if I were a pregnant male stripper dancing like Carlton from Fresh Prince of Belair. Then he said something so profound I will never forget. He said " NO, dumbass!". I was shocked at his blatant rudeness. So me being one to question and disagree said " Well if Tony Danza is walking down the street listening to Tiny Dancer who's to say he is not the tiny dancer?". The professor looked at me with disgust as if he had just witnessed a pig being castrated. Then just as he slammed his hands on the desk and was about to scream this beautiful girl said something about the brain or something. Honestly I have no idea what she said all I know is I couldn't hear anything except for what sounded like Enrique Englasias whispering " Go to her." in his spanish accent. So after class I walked up to her and started serinating her with the Poke Rap. ya know " I want to be the best there ever was. To beat the rest yea that's my cause. Electrode, Diglett, Nidoran, Mankey,Venusaur, Rattata, Fearow, Pidgey,Seaking, Jolteon, Dragonite, Gastly,Ponyta, Vaporeon, Poliwrath, Butterfree. Catch em catch em, gotta catch em all.". I think I scared her because she then tazed and pepper sprayed me. It was at this exact moment I relized that I needed a Starmie to defeat Charizard, but I needed a high level Starmie... this will surely take some work.

A couple days later I was watching Doug, a recording of course and he made this banana pizza on accident and it looked quite scrumptous. So logically I tried to make one, but sad to say I had no bananas or pizza dough or sauce. What I did have was ramen noodles and cream cheese, FYI they aren't good together. Anyway I go back to my bean bag chair grab my pokemon color edition gameboy and start the search for a Starmie, but all I could find were damn Magikarps. They are in no way magical they suck, well until they turn into Gyrados. So I shut off my gameboy with anger and go for a walk. As I am walking down the street the police turn on thier pretty shiny lights and "pull me over". They get out of the car and the driver started saying " Smerfsy slappa perksy waka oo poo do sacka flert." I reply " What?". The second officer looked as if he had a carrot in his ass and a mouth full of marshmallows and says "Hey there how ya doin?" "Good." I said. this obviously angered the lerch look alike officer and started yelling " BLASH DA BLOOP SHEMDA COOPDER!". So obviously I brake out in song and dance to the popluar Vanilla Ice Ice Ice Baby. Then they shot me with bean bags and I then hit the ground and whack my head on the sidewalk. All of a sudden I'm in outerspace soaring through the wonders with jet for feet and lazer guns for hands. I start firing my lazer hands " PEW PEW PEW PEW". I then land on a plant I believe it was Mars, becuase it was red and there was war. So naturally I start "moon walking" becasue of the lack of gravity and I did the best damn "moon walk" of all time. Sad to say I woke up to the barks of starving fish and realized this was all a dream... damn.

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